(Closed) Caught my fiancé in a huge lie

posted 5 years ago in Emotional
Post # 121
Member
61 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: July 2016

I had an ex who used to “cry” too. 

Unfortunately he isn’t crying because he feels bad, he’s crying because he was caught.

People do occasionally hurt each other, but the difference is, they feel bad and don’t do it again. If your fiancé felt bad about doing this….he would have stopped. He wouldn’t have let it continue, and wouldn’t have then gone even further by giving his cell phone number. 

Ask yourself this….would you ever do this to him? Even if it never led to actual sex….would you have an intimate relationship with another man behind your fiances back?

My guess is no. Because you love and respect your commitment. 

Post # 122
Member
561 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2016 - Temecula, California

View original reply
amanda1988:  I like it.

Post # 123
Member
4225 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2015 - Hotel Ballroom

Bully from your past or not…that is 100% inaproproate! I’d dump him. Sorry bee 🙁

Post # 124
Member
8 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: May 2016

Dump his ass! Run as far as you can while you can. As a guy I finfd men like that to be the worst, most cruel douchebags to the women that love them unconditionally. He is obviously trying his luck with her, otherwise he would have stood up for your honor as soon as she started making advances, given how mean she was to you.

My deepest sympathies. I hope the pain will be short and you find someone who will treat you right (they are out there!) Men like this think they can have it all, constantly trying to secure a backup girl just on case. Real men stand by their fiancée. 

 

Post # 125
Member
2687 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

123 replies.. this has GOT to be good.. BRB, gonna read the thread now!

Post # 126
Member
297 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2017

View original reply
kellijo13: Agreed! My hope is that OP kicked him out not because of the responses she’s received on WB, but because she recognizes the trust (and just basic not being a douche) that’s been violated, and she should absolutely take her time in making her decisions for herself. It’s her life, not mine. So we are on the same page there. 

That said, OP – if you are confident in your decision but find yourself seeking validation, this thread can be a good place to start.

Post # 127
Member
561 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2016 - Temecula, California

The crying part really irritates me.  He’s crying.  Okay.  We get it you are sad.  More like scared.  Scared that now the person they lied to and hurt will walk away forever.  Yeah.  He should be afraid.  Sush bulls#!%.  

 

MINI RANT:  

My sister caught her boyfriend sexting/sex-emailing girls.  When she confronted him… it sounded pretty similar.  My sister said, “He cried in my lap, I could feel the tears through my jeans.  He kept saying that he is sorry and that it will never happen again.”  I hope so sis.  I hope so.  I told her that he is only acting that way because he got caught.  She would respond with, “No you don’t understand..he was REALLY sad.”  I would agree and say, “Yeah I bet he was sad.  Sad he got caught.”  I told her that if she was happy the I am happy, but I can’t help but be suspicious.  LOL.

Post # 128
Member
1744 posts
Bumble bee

So sorry that you’re in this position, but if it was going to happen- before the wedding is better than after. 

Hopefully you can have a great party if you can’t cancel or get refunds.  In the last 6 mos or so I read about a bride who called the wedding off at the last minute.  It was too late for any refunds, and, understandably, she wasn’t really in a mood to party on what was to have been her wedding day.  She coordinated with some battered womens/homeless shelters and women and children who haven’t had anything nice happen in quite some time were treated to a wonderful meal and reception.  I think some hairdressers even volunteered to get them all beautified for the event.  Just saying, that if the money cannot be recovered there can still be a party for someone. 

Post # 129
Member
463 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2015

What an asshole! Oh my:( I’m so sorry. It’s hurting like hell but imagine a marriage without trust and the personal backstory with this girl is such a greater betrayal. Once the pain and the yucky wedding cancelling stuff is done,  you’ll be so happy that you dodges this bullet.

Post # 130
Member
113 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2017

Stay strong OP.

Post # 131
Member
2923 posts
Sugar bee

Please get tested for STDs as I wouldn’t believe/trust  ANYTHING he says.

Post # 132
Member
9384 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2016

View original reply
arosebyanyothername:  my family doctor growing up (who was also the OBGYN who delivered me!) instilled in me the habit of getting tested after every single breakup.  It’s just what you do…

Post # 133
Member
273 posts
Helper bee

View original reply
threeblindmice:  Unless this other woman is also in a relationship that’s supposed to be monogamous, this whole situation is 110% the OP’s fiance’s fault. I don’t get why everyone wants to demonize the “other woman” when the attached man could have easily just said no.

Post # 134
Member
4706 posts
Honey bee

View original reply
futuremrsherron:  there is NOTHING this man (and I use that term lightly) could ever do to make him trust worthy again. If you cannot get $ back from your vendors, have a sick party celebrating the fact that you figured this out before the wedding.

Be kind to yourself bee. I am so sorry this jackass did this to you. May he burn in hell.

Post # 135
Member
4706 posts
Honey bee

View original reply
fascinated:  what an awesome idea! Maybe the photographers could take photos of these families and give them the rights.

The topic ‘Caught my fiancé in a huge lie’ is closed to new replies.

Find Amazing Vendors