(Closed) CAUTION!!! SERIOUS VENT!!! MIGHT RUIN YOUR DAY!!!

posted 7 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
1986 posts
Buzzing bee

Why would you invite them?

Post # 4
Member
3257 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

This day is about you, not about them. If they abused you and caused you that much pain, there’s no reason you should invite them.

Post # 5
Member
7300 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2012

@pynkbunnie: wow. I don’t know what to say. You are a strong person for inviting them because if it were me, I would have cut them all out. I don’t think your wedding day should be the day for forced therapy and healing. Perhaps before the wedding you can sit down and talk it out. If it gets out of hand, let them know that if you don’t get out what you want to get out, they will not be welcomed to the ceremony. I wish you the best.

Post # 6
Member
1543 posts
Bumble bee

Get to a therapist, ASAP! No ifs ands or buts. If insurance/finances are an issue, see if they will work with you for a reduced rate. Or possibly they could recommend someone who would. Support groups come to mind as well. I wish you strength, wisdom, patience and lots of good luck!

Post # 7
Member
1986 posts
Buzzing bee

@pynkbunnie: How is your Fiance ok that a man who molested you is going to be at the wedding?

Post # 8
Member
108 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: March 2011

With 13 days to go you could try to talk to them but I’m not sure that would make things better at this point.  You might just stir the pot more.  Just try to remember why you and your fiance love each other and are getting married.  Its not about your mom and stepdad and whoever else is in the picture.  It’s about you and your future husband on your wedding day, forming your own family from that point on and moving through life together.

I would discuss this with your bridesmaids or your core group of friends that will be with you on the day of the wedding.  They can help you maintain focus on what the day is about and maybe keep some of your family members at a distance. 

Good Luck!

 

 

Post # 9
Member
337 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

is your step father coming? i’d hate for him to ruin your day.

Post # 10
Member
3364 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: December 2011

You know what really happened! And until YOU come to terms with it and let go for you, it will always be a burden, it will always be the big elephant in the middle of the room! 

Be the bigger person! Most people accept living in denial, its sad! 

And most people arent strong like you and cant face the facts!

Be patient but strong!

It takes time to heal all wounds!

Hold your head up high, marry the man of your dreams and walk back up that aisle a new woman and as your husbands wife! =]

Post # 12
Member
337 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

Well sweetie, I’m glad to hear your step dad won’t be there.. given your history it would be a shame to have him looming there.

Your day will be just FAB and all about you.. you won’t even notice the family that bother you. I see why you invited them anwyays, family issues can be such a shit show at times.

 You’ll be enjoying the romanticism and bliss of the day… Nothing will bother you! xo and postive vibes being sent your way!! 🙂

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