(Closed) Ceremony/Reception Question

posted 7 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
764 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

@armychica06: I’m gonna go with rude. Think about it… Half your guests will be walking to reception and the other will be walking to their cars.

Post # 5
1041 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

I agree with PP. Just keep the whole thing small instead of excluding some people.

Post # 6
26 posts
  • Wedding: September 2011

@armychica06: I’d say do whatever you can to invite all guests to both. If you can’t afford to invite a certain amount of guests to the reception you may not want to invite them to the ceremony either, especially with what @SFreeman2187: said- you don’t want half to be walking to the reception and half to their cars… or to have the guests talking and some mentioning the reception and some not knowing about it! Not only would it be awkward for them, it’d be awkward for you!

Post # 7
1755 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

I hate to say it because I do understand financial constraints, however with both events on the same property, I think it would be impossible not to include everyone for both.  Not to mention, there would potentially be people who were invited only to the ceremony that would see people wandering over to the reception and simply assume they were invited to it as well.

Post # 8
1944 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2009

For me it’s definetly rude. Also I get that you have 5 days prior to give your numbers but if I received a last minute invite like that so that you can fill your space, I’d decline bc that leaves alot to be assumed such as a gift grab to your guests.

Post # 9
257 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

definitely rude. 

i would be offended.  i think the only time i would be okay with a sort of tiered wedding is to have a smaller intimate ceremony with just family and friends and then a larger reception to party with everyone else.  i like wedding ceremonies but sometimes they are a little tiring and most people only show up to reception and skip the ceremony.

Post # 10
4419 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: December 2010

I don’t think it’s appropriate to invite people to the ceremony and then not invite them to the reception.  You need to cut back on your guest list so everyone can attend the reception. You can get away with inviting people to the reception and not the ceremony, but not the other way around. 

I mean, how would you feel if you were invited to a wedding ceremony, and then found out you weren’t important enough to be invited to the reception that’s at the same venue? I would feel hurt if I was one of the people asked to go home and not asked to stay and party. 

Post # 13
313 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

Armychica, I think that the reason you’re asking a forum is because you want a variety of opinions, not just yours. So while you wouldn’t mind not being invited to the reception, there are people that would find it rude. It is your day and you can do what you want, but I think I would also be offended if I had to go home afterwards instead of to the celebration.

Post # 14
2854 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

Re/ the perception issue… I think if there were people you had a good relationship with and would understand, it might be ok.

Co workers for example. Let them know you really want to share the ceremony with them, but there’s limited space in the reception. But I’d pair that with an invitation to take them out to lunch another day (like a co-worker reception). 

The safest bet though is to just keep everything small.

Post # 15
197 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

I would say this is a no no, and something I have never heard of.  If you don’t have the costs to invite them to the reception, don’t invite them at all.

Post # 16
5110 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: November 2011

I think its a bit rude… Especially if some of the people that are walking to their cars have attended bridal showers and things like that. I feel like if you are going to invite someone it should be all or nothing.

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