Post # 1
Help (again) please!
To make a long story short, our wedding date is Sept 29, 2012 and we need to send in our deposits for our venues (yesterday), but my sister-in-law and brother (who are both in the wedding) just told me (yesterday) they are expecting Oct 5th, so they won’t be able to drive 4 hours to our wedding.
I don’t want to have our wedding without my brother, but there are no more days available at the venue we’d like in July, Aug or September.
I feel I have 2 options, and it all has to be done quickly.
1. Change the wedding venue and date to my home town and have the reception at my parent’s house, so they will be able to attend.
2. Have the wedding without them.
I am bummed either way and would like some advice.
PS, We have already sent out save-the-dates, and half the guest are coming from across the country :/
Post # 3
Since you already sent the Save-The-Date Cards and people may have already started making travel arrangements, you may be stuck with keeping the date. Both options kind of stink, because you either lose two important guests, or you don’t have the wedding you’ve been planning.
I would let your brother/SIL that you understand they won’t be able to make it, and how excited you are to meet your future neice/nephew after all the wedding festivities are over.
Sorry there aren’t better options for you!
Post # 4
This exact same thing happened to me with Future Sister-In-Law and Future Brother-In-Law. It sucked (and they knew they were pregnant and their due date when we OK’d our date with them, but they didn’t tell us!), but I’m really happy with what we ended up doing. One thing to keep in mind is babies aren’t always on time, which means that she could go into labor the night before and your parents would have to pick between being with them for the birth or being at the wedding.
This is what we decided:
We are having a small ceremony at a nearby B+B for just 10 people (our immediate families), and going out for a nice dinner. It was important for us to have Future Brother-In-Law and Future Sister-In-Law part of our wedding. This is taking place a few months before our original wedding date so Future Sister-In-Law and Future Brother-In-Law will def be able to come.
Then, we are having our reception as planned understanding that Future Brother-In-Law and Future Sister-In-Law might not make it. But, we’ll feel good that they were there when we said our vows since that’s when we’re bringing our 2 families together.
Things I like: I get to wear my dress twice!!! Way less stress at the reception because you’re already married!
Post # 5
REALLY tough… have you thought of moving further into Fall? November weddings are lovely and I know they’ll have a newborn but they sleep mostly anyway and EVERYONE loves a babyyy so you’ll get to have your sis & her whole family and when the baby grows up you can say he/she was at your wedding!
I wouldn’t change your plans too much (like venue cuz thats sad~ you fell in love with a venue for a reason!) so if you just waited a 6-8 weeks you could have the best of both worlds right?!
Post # 6
Sicne you’ve already sent out Save-The-Date Cards and people have already made arrangements to attend I would say to keep the date. Could just your brother make it to the wedding?
Post # 7
I would just have two ceremonies if I were you. I’d have the first ceremony in your hometown with your immediate family and probably buy an elopement package from a chapel or a bed and breakfast (normally these packages will let you bring guests, just Google ‘elopement packages’ in your area) and then I’d go out to eat with your family afterward. Then, soon after, I’d have the big wedding to have the weding experience and celebrate with the rest of your guests.
This way you get both things you want! 🙂
Post # 8
I would be the same as you and change the date… I think relatives and friends traveling would understand. The one person I totally want at my wedding is my brother. He’s in Canada and is bringing his 2 1/2 yr old son with him. If he was unable to make it due to a situation I would do everything in my power to help him or move it so he could be here…. good luck it’s a difficult choice and only you and your fiance can decide. Talk to your brother and see what he says….