(Closed) Change the date for the best man.

posted 4 years ago in Grooms/men
Post # 2
2103 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

In the big scheme of things, this is not the end of the world. Perhaps he can spend time with his friend before the wedding for his bachelor party or some other way. You should not alter your wedding date for others. The only pertinent people are you two and the officiant. Not only has the date not worked once, but twice?! Nope… My husbands original best man, his eldest brother, ended up not showing up to the wedding at all. Boy would we have been even more pissed had we changed the date to suit him. How many more years will you push back your wedding for someone else? You need to do what is best for the two of you. Your Fiance will have to get over it and choose someone else. 

Post # 3
595 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2015

I think you got your answer on the other post you made about this a little while ago.

Are you sure you want to get married? You seem to WANT to push your wedding back. Please, take no offense, its just what popped in my head when I saw this second post.

Post # 4
1164 posts
Bumble bee

Allisoninaz:  IF you decide to move the date for the best man you need to ask him for dates he can definitely do first and pick one of those or you are likely to run in to this problem again.

Post # 5
7673 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

Allisoninaz:  Don’t change the date again, because too much is already committed. Sometimes life plans clash. No one has done anything wrong. He didn’t delay the pregnancy for your wedding (nor should he have), and you shouldn’t delay your wedding for his wife’s pregnancy. There will be many other times for your fiance and his best friend to share together. Also, if other people have spent money (e.g. booking tickets), it’s rude to them to move the wedding.

Post # 6
2510 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

I wouldn’t change the date- it is impossible to pick a date that works for everyone.  We picked the date and one of my very best friends months later got in a really prostegious program that involved her being overseas during my wedding.   We would have lost SO much money changing the date, and tons of family and friends are out of town and already bought plane tickets, so changing the date was out of the question.  I was definitely disappointed, but I understood.  She still was able to come to my bridal shower to at least celebrate with me, and she even sent both my husband and I a video message on the morning of the wedding.  I definitely would have prefered having her there, but my wedding day was awesome, and there were so many amazing people there that I didn’t have the chance to miss her.  

Post # 7
4040 posts
Honey bee

Nope – don’t change it. There always will be something up, with one of your bridal party members.

Post # 8
2473 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2017

Don’t change it again.  I could maybe understand changing it once, but come on- you can’t please everyone.

Besides, you could change it and find out that another friend/family memebr is due at that time.

Post # 10
3256 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

I agree – don’t change it again.   They still might but be able to travel with all they have going on.  It’s just unlucky, but it’s life.  Maybe things will align and he can get a last minute flight if it works out.  But probably not, and that’s OK.  Just plan a visit as soon as you can. 

Post # 11
6529 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: September 2013

Allisoninaz:  you already changed the date once for this guy. and then his wife got pregnant and now you want to change it again? 


ABSOLUTELY NOT. He will just have to celebrate with him some other way. This would not fly in my book. I give you credit for being so understanding because I wouldn’t have changed the date the first time. You and your Fiance are the ones getting married. You already have things booked, why are you going to cause yourself more stress?

Post # 12
7647 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2012

Allisoninaz:  They didn’t put their life on hold for you, and you shouldn’t for them. I understand he is your FI’s best friend, but he’ll either have to make it or bow out. He should understand ther is already stuff booked.

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