Changes in relationship from living together to married

posted 3 months ago in Relationships
Post # 2
Member
6401 posts
Bee Keeper

Sounds like you’re doing exactly what we did. We moved in together after we got engaged, about 9  months before the wedding. Honestly not much changed in our relationship after the wedding, but I didn’t see that as a bad thing. I also didn’t feel like much changed when we moved in together…it was still the same old us, just with a hell of a lot more convenience lol. 

Anyway, the wedding was still exciting and we still had that newlywed glow for awhile – I’d say we still have it actually. But our life on a day to day basis? No, there was not a major change after the wedding. I think what change there was has been more subtle and gradual…things like purchasing a car together, sharing finances…it’s just sort of a mental shift in thinking of each other as a family, and that feeling has definitely increased since the wedding and has been really nice.

Post # 3
Member
2556 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2015 - St Peter's Church, East Maitland, and Bella Vista, Newcastle

We moved in together before we got engaged, and had been living together nearly two years when we did get married.  Moving in did take some getting used to – I was very very used to doing things my way and unconsciously expected him to go along with that, which took some time to sort out! There was little change when we married – the one big thing was that we bought a house about five months after our wedding, but other than that nothing really changed.

Post # 4
Member
6698 posts
Bee Keeper

christinechas :  

Marriage doesn’t really bring a great change unless you haven’t lived together, so yes, life will change when you move in together.  But the change is kind of quotidian and pragmatic ,not romantic and magical. IMO anyway. 

Post # 5
Member
451 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: March 2017

D.H and I didn’t move in together until we got married, and honestly our relationship only got better. I think it just depends on your personalities, and where you’re at in your relationship. 

Post # 6
Member
4973 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

christinechas :  We lived together for about three years before our wedding, and we love the extra sense of permanence that marriage brought.    

Moving in together was a far greater adjustment for both of us.  I’m so glad we got that out of the way well before the wedding.  LOL  

Post # 7
Member
8586 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2016

We lived together for about 7 months before getting married. Getting married really didn’t change anything about our relationship. We had a party and signed a piece of paper. But nothing about us or our relationship changed.

Don’t get me wrong, the wedding was still amazing and one of the best days of my lives. We were on cloud nine during our whole honeymoon. But really in our day to day nothing changed. It never felt like there was a shift in our relationship.

But I didn’t feel like anything really changed when we moved in together either.

Post # 8
Member
700 posts
Busy bee

Absolutely nothing changed in our relationship. Don’t expect anything to change because it won’t. 

Post # 9
Member
1810 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: March 2017

We lived together for many years before marriage. Marriage did change our relationship. People treated us somewhat different because we were spouses and not just boyfriend and girlfriend. It cemented our devotion to each other and made us feel more connected. That feeling is still there more than a year after the wedding. 

Post # 10
Member
8659 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2016

No change. I don’t see why you would want one, not all change is great. A lot of times it working the kinks out.

Post # 11
Member
1168 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2017

It didn’t change anything at all for us. We already had joint banking accounts while living together before marriage and had been living together for about 2 years before getting married. The only thing that changed was our last names and people took us more seriously as a couple. The way they talked to us was different and more “serious” which was a little odd. 

Post # 12
Member
1441 posts
Bumble bee

a lot of the moving-in-together changes kinda suck, honestly…and traditionally people moved in together when they got married so thats usually what people meant when they say ‘things change when you get married’. 

getting used to someone else in your space all the time and dealing with all the unfun, unsexy aspects of your SO isn’t the most romantic thing in the world. don’t get me wrong, you get into the swing of things and then living together is generally great, its just that the growing pains aren’t the best. i’m actually really glad we lived together first so that getting married wasn’t linked to that awkward transition period of moving in and getting used to each other in that regard. 

Post # 13
Member
590 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2018

No change whatsoever from the Mrs who has been married 48 hours!! Only difference is now we can try to conceive 

Post # 14
Member
352 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2018

We’re not married yet but have already lived together for 4 years, own a house and a dog so I don’t expect much to change.

Post # 15
Member
834 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2017

the difference from living together to getting married is this: now I call him my husband. Our relationship is the same as it always was.

That’s why I never know what to say when friends/relatives ask how married life is. 

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