Changing Gift Amount You Give After Your Own Wedding

posted 3 years ago in Gifts and Registries
Post # 16
Member
408 posts
Helper bee

I was just in a similar situation (generous guest but couldnt attend their wedding). We ended up giving half of wha they gave us (which still would be a generous amount for those attending a wedding in my family). So in your example, I would probably either give them 100 or something off the registry for around that (not sure where your from but im guessing 100 is generous there). Put it this way, they arent paying for anything for you, so ANYTHING they receive from you is truely a gift.

In terms of considering others gifts, I think it depends on the situation. You always see the examples of a younger relative giving a smaller gift because they are starting out or have no money, and you shouldnt reciprocate that if you can afford something nicer. However, at our wedding, a good number of my husbands well off friends/family were not that generous (granted some of them had to get a hotel night- no flight). This includes the best man who got us a smaller gift off the registry, and RSVPed his girlfriend to the wedding and rehersal dinner, and gave a pretty lame excuse on why she didnt show up on top of not apologizing to me or my family who paid for the wedding and rehersal dinner. Same kid owns 2 luxury cars and a 600K house…needless to say when we have to fly to their wedding, we probably wont worry about stretching our budget to get them a super expensive gift.

 

Post # 17
Member
23 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: April 2018 - City, State

My suggestion is no actual gift..but send a card with a super cute IOU of a night out (in my case that would be dinner at a nice restaurant with a bottle of wine but whatever floats your/their boat)

They probably don’t NEED anything (and if they do I’m sure they’ll have many wedding gifts), but celebrating with friends that couldn’t make it to my wedding would be my next best thing to seeing them enjoy themselves at my wedding

ETA hmmm seeing it’s cross country vs just out of town which is what my mind read this as sorry… It’s Monday… This might be an inconvenient option. 

I’m getting married in Toronto, my partner’s family is from Ohio so we’re having this problem. I’d still prefer time with my friends over a gift (we travel to Ohio frequently so I’ve attended weddings and they will probably not be able to attend mine). I also agree with a PP that $150-200 is avg here. I prefer to give $200 plus some kind of handmade or personal celebration. Money (IMHO) is just money unless it’s a young couple to jump start them 🙂

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