(Closed) Changing my mind about name change – AFTER the wedding

posted 9 years ago in Names
Post # 3
10635 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: January 2011

I think everyone has trouble adjusting to a new name, even those who were super excited to be Mrs. Hislastname.  DO what you want though!  There’s no rule that says you have to change it right away.  You could leave it as is and make the decision when you have kids, or you could change it now and change it back (here it isn’t even a legal name change so you can revert to your legal name whenever you want).

I did not change my name, but socially am going by his.  So far it hasn’t been an issue.

Post # 4
10635 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: January 2011

You should also check out the board devoted to names, it’s under Not Wedding Related.

Post # 6
9816 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

I had planned to change mine too, and never did. I just didn’t want to. It’s not because I’m not proud of who I married, I just don’t like the name!

Post # 7
7294 posts
Busy Beekeeper

i was the opposite, i only decided to change my name after my wedding.  i haven’t done it  yet though only cuz i am waiting until i finish school.  throughout reading your post i was simply going to tell you not to change it if you don’t want to. its no biggie.  but if the kids thing is important to you, then i am not sure what to tell you…..unless you are looking for people to say it is okay for you not to have the same last name as your kids, which it is.

Post # 8
15063 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

I didnt truely 100% want to cause my name has been ME for sooo long, but I was eventually going to do it cause it meant so much to my husband.  It took me about 2 months to get to the social security office to get the ball rolling to get it changed.  I’ve since only changed my passport (cause I was still within the 1 yr period to change it for free), and 2 of my 5 credit cards. I havent done my licence yet.  I thought it would be really weird and hard to get used to, but actually seeing my new name on my credit cards now, it looks pretty normal.  My old name still looks normal too.  They’re both me now.  Maybe its my supppppeeer slow transition and easing into it…

Post # 9
1418 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

@Wonderstruck: My bf is very into me changing my last name. Growing up, I always said I would keep my last name because I am Croatian and am proud of my heritage. As I grew into womanhood I figured I would be traditional and change my name. I understand male pride and how it is important to them for their wives to share the same last name. Oddly enough, my bf and I were talking about this today. I said that I am planning on changing to his last name when we get married, but would like to use my last name at work. I’m a teacher and I love when my students tell me their sister, brother, cousin, etc., had me “x” years ago. He was a little bit put off, which is so odd considering how easy-going he is. I think it has to do with the fact that I am the more controlling one in the relationship, strong roots, stable job, higher salary, more education. I think he felt as though if he could not take over some of these roles, at least he could have me take his last name. I don’t see the huge significance because it is not like I work in a field where I will see and talk to men all the time and want to look “single,” I teach 12 year olds who need to be reminded the difference between Ms., Miss, and Mrs. haha!  Not that I will have to worry about this for a while. We plan on getting engaged before the new year, and probably married two years after that.

Post # 10
2550 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

My name is offically changed and it only took 4 months.  I was happy to change my last name because its just a new phase of my life. Maybe I’m different because this is actually my 3rd name change.  My parents changed my last name as a child for religious reasons so I always had 2 last names.  Now I just have Hubby’s and its not a bad last name.  Plus he is from a very small family and we intend to keep his family name going. 

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