Post # 1
So, I am about to have my BMs order their dresses. 3 of them will be in sizes 2-16, one will be in size 18 or 20, and one will be in a size 22 or 24. When I was comparison shopping, I realized that the plus sized dresses will cost more than the regular dresses.
So, my question is–who pays for the extra charge? Do I split the cost among the BMs, make the order myself, and ask each of them to pay me the “average” cost of the dress?
Or do I ask each Bridesmaid or Best Man to each call in to the shop individually to order and pay for the cost of their individual dress ($15-30 more for the plus sized dresses)?
What have you done/would you do in this situation?
Post # 3
Knowing me I’d offer to pick up the extra cost, but shoot, being a plus size girl myself, im kinda used to having to pay a little extra for things!
Do they know its extra?? or will they be told about the additional cost for size?
Post # 4
You should just have each girl buy their own dresses. I’m plus size and I’m use to paying a little more because of the size. I doubt your voluptuous BM’s will have an issue with it.
Post # 5
Honestly? I’d just have each Bridesmaid or Best Man buy their own individual gown without drawing attention to the price difference. If the BMs with more expensive dresses say that they just can’t afford it offer to help out with the extra $30 or so. I don’t think it would be a problem. It’s sort of like paying extra for alterations. If two of your BMs needed their skirt hemmed or dress let out, you wouldn’t make the rest of your BMs pitch in to help, right?
Post # 6
@CupCakeMeg: I guess that is my question too–I would be unsure about whether to tell them or not.
Also, weirdly enough different locations charge different amounts for the plus sized dresses!!! Pearl’s place had the best price on the regular sizes but said they would charge $50 EXTRA for the size 22 or 24, versus $20 extra at PS Bridal.
I think I can get Pearl’s Place to match or beat the best price I found for the plus-sized dresses so that they can all order from the same place.
Post # 7
@bikinihoneymoon: How ridiculous of a difference in charge! Can you split up your orders?! Or just send your ladies to whoever they want to pay! Geesh! I would just let them handle it themselves and if they say anything to you, then worry about it!
Post # 8
I think it’s pretty normal to have to pay extra for plus-sized clothing in general so I would just have each Bridesmaid or Best Man pay for their dress individually. If you want to cover the difference for those two girls it would be a nice gesture but totally not necessary.
Post # 9
@CupCakeMeg: I would be worried that the dye lots would be different if they got them from different stores. I was really pleased with how nice the people at Pearl’s Place seemed, and I can’t imagine that they won’t match that price to get our business.
@Everyone: The more I think about it, the more I feel like I’d want to pick up the extra charge. I just hate the idea that 2 of them would have to pay more from the outset. I get the comparison to alterations, but something about it seems discriminatory to me. I know that there is more fabric so it actually costs more to make, but it still feels wrong!
Post # 10
I’m not sure how much more your extra cost is, but two of my girls are plus size and only had to pay an extra $20 each. i know it totally sucks to have to pay extra for the same dress, but $20 wasn’t super terrible. they paid for this extra cost.
Post # 11
I voted other, because I paid for all of my girls dresses–one of my girls is plus size, the other 3 are not, but I picked up the cost of all of my girls dresses. I know it can be a nightmare to be in someone’s wedding, and I want to make this as painless as possible, so Fiance and I agreed that we are picking up the cost of just about everything for our attendants.
Post # 12
- Wedding: May 2011 - Vandiver Inn
As someone who has been a plus-sized bridesmaid more than once, I always pay the extra myself.
Post # 13
The plus-sized girls should pay extra. It wouldn’t be fair for the others to pay extra. Same rule as dining out – you eat more, you put in more $ when the bill arrives!
Post # 14
They should each pay for their own dress, you can make the order and have them repay you. It wouldn’t be fair to spread the cost of the one girl’s dress to them all, it’s not their fault she’s that size.
Post # 15
Each girl should pay for her own. Sometimes it costs more for tall girls to get extra fabric or other scenarios that have nothing to do with being plus-sized. I’m certainly not expecting anyone to pick up the extra I sometimes pay for being 5’11”. 🙂
Post # 16
If the girls are paying for their own dresses already then they should pay the extra cost for the extra fabric. It is not your duty to pick up the tab.