(Closed) Charity versus Gifts

posted 6 years ago in Etiquette
  • poll: Charity versus Gifts
    have people donate non-parishable food items : (5 votes)
    23 %
    register for gifts : (17 votes)
    77 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    3092 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    Do you mean you want to ask guests to donate non-perishables to be donated to a food bank or to be put in your cupboard?

     

    Well, either way, I think a traditional registry makes more sense.  If people choose to give you a gift it should be up to them what they gift you. 

    Plus, if you want to give to the food bank or wherever you’d make a bigger difference if you just cut them a check.

    Post # 5
    Member
    3092 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    @dihy:  lol yeah I figured…wasn’t sure though if you were saying you aren’t rich and that getting some food would be a nice gift for you ๐Ÿ˜‰ 

    Post # 6
    Member
    2214 posts
    Buzzing bee

    @dihy:  lol. Your original post made it seem like guests would be donating non-perishable foods to you and your Fiance, which is a little weird. If it’s for a food bank that might be okay, depending on your guests. I think my family would be confused if I asked them to bring canned goods to the wedding. And it’s also not convenient for Out of Town people. Also, people tend to bring registry gifts to the shower, but bring cards with checks/cash to the wedding (at least in my family/social circle) so that’s something to consider as well.

    Post # 7
    Member
    1832 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: January 2013

    Just register for gifts. If you want to make a donation part of your wedding donate to a charity instead of giving out wedding favors to your guest at the wedding. Thats what I’m doing.

    Post # 9
    Member
    6124 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: August 2012

    I would either

    1) not register, people normally get you cash

    2) register for a few small items, others will do cash

    3) register for anything you want, big or little

     

    I would not turn the wedding into a donations serivce.  I know your heart is in the right place, but it doesn’t work for wedding events.  If you’d like to donate your cash to a good cause AFTER the wedding, then you can do that.

    Post # 10
    Member
    155 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: October 2013

    I usually give a gift value of about 70 dollars (100 if I’m close to the person) I would not be willing to bring 70 dollars worth of canned goods to a wedding. Please do a registry. I always hate it when people don’t I prefer to give real gifts rather than cash.

    Post # 12
    Member
    6124 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: August 2012

    If you do not want to register, then it is perfectly fine to simply not register for anything.  If there is no registry, people generally will just give cash instead.  You are right, you don’t say “cash preferred” even mentioning gifts at all (even no gifts) is bad taste.

     

    I would maybe let your mom or aunts know you’re not registering but saving for XYZ and let the word get spread around.  People might even ask you directly if you registered anywhere.  That’s when you can say, no we did not but we are saving for XYZ (house, furniture, car, etc).  Some poeple will feel strongly about giving a physical gift – there’s nothing you can do about that, but I don’t think it will be common.

    So in the end, simply do not register and let the word get spread. 

    Post # 13
    Member
    11234 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: August 2013

    Just register and have the word spread that gifts should be sent to your home.

    Post # 14
    Member
    578 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: April 2012

    I am all for charity registries.  Asking people to bring canned food to the wedding would be inconvenient (for them and for you, because you would have to bring it to the food bank), but you can ask them to make a donation to a charity instead of gifts.  For our wedding, we put a note on our website saying something like: “All we want is to celebrate our marriage with our loved ones.  If you would like to honor us with a gift, please consider making a donation to _____.”  You could specify a charity, or you could just say “to the charity of your choice”.  All of our guests honored our wishes, and nobody brought gifts to the wedding.  

    The topic ‘Charity versus Gifts’ is closed to new replies.

    Find Amazing Vendors