Cheap As POSSIBLE Wedding Ideas PLEASE NO JUDGING

posted 2 months ago in DIY
Post # 31
Member
33 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: August 2019

sunburn :  or maybe she’s saying “no judging” because people with financial struggles are often constantly being judged for their financial decisions by people who are not in their situation 🤔

Post # 32
Member
67 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: June 2018

beekeeper2018 :  When someone is on government assistance for basic living necessities that they cannot afford on their own yet want to spend $3,000 on a unnecessary party, I am going to judge that.  Not being on assistance, but for wasting precious money on a unnecessary party.  Like I said there is nothing wrong with not spending thousands on a wedding.   My wedding cost $25.00 and has lasted longer than 70% of all marriages.  

Post # 33
Member
67 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: June 2018

echomomm :  I am sorry I am anything but privlidged.  I have worked my butt off my entire life for what we have.  My husband and I have been so poor at one point we had to eat ramen noodles for weeks.  I know what it is like living very frugal and where we are finally financially comfortable.  When we were so broke we barely made ends meet we definitley did not spend money on unnecessary items.  

Post # 34
Member
33 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: August 2019

 

justanormalgal :  that’s fine. You do you. I’m just a firm believer that we never truly know what’s going on in a persons life. If they’re on assistance but it’s important to then that they have a wedding, I support that. That’s just me. I find it easier not to judge people for positive things. 

 

ETA: no need to compare you marriage to others. I doubt that 70% is a legit statistic. Marriages are not a competition. 

Post # 35
Member
67 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: June 2018

beekeeper2018 :  Everyone is entitled to their own opinion and I appreciate your non-bashing of mine.  You are right my statistic is probably not 100% legit, but the divorce rate in this country is VERY high especially for two stupid kids who ran off at 18 & 19 to get married.  I am very proud we made it to 25 years, because we could have called it quits many many times.  laughing

Post # 36
Member
33 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: August 2019

justanormalgal :  well it sounds like it worked for you! That’s what matters in the end. 🙂

Post # 37
Member
11490 posts
Sugar Beekeeper

Life is not fair. It does not sound like you can afford or justify spending anything close to 3K on a party. Your original idea made the most sense. Get married, if you are really in any kind of position to do so, then have a reception or anniversary celebration when you are able. If you have relatives who would judge you for that, then you need to stop listening to their opinions. 

Post # 38
Member
3449 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

harleybaby :  you mentioned that you have a large family that would start a war if you had a small wedding. Presumably those people know that you aren’t rolling in dough and that weddings aren’t cheap. So, I’d be going around to all these entitled relatives and seeing how they can contribute. 

Grandma- hem the dress

Cousin Shirley- print out the invitations at work

Aunt Judy- use her spare bedroom as a bridal suite (for getting ready/photos)

Aunt Betsy- loan me the champagne flutes for toasting and a fancy knife to cut the cake

Big brother- get ordained online and perform the service

Uncle Sheldon- drive us between the ceremony and reception in his new SUV

Cousin Pam- do my face since she models makeup on instagram

and so on, and so on. Personally, I don’t believe in potlucks, but in your position, I’d maybe have a huge pasta bar (penne, fetuccine, spaghetti, various sauces, and maybe 2 proteins), garlic bread, a salad bar and the cheapest cake I could find at Sam’s Club. 

I have a relative who up and decided to get married with 6 weeks’ notice. The whole family is rallying around the couple to pitch in where possible so they can have a nice wedding despite being low on time and funds. Not sitting on our hands demanding invitations. 

Post # 39
Member
116 posts
Blushing bee

Our budget was the same as yours.  $3k tops, preferably $2k.  I’d estimate we fell somewhere in the middle.

We had about 75 people.  “Invites” were communicated via facebook group with a link to the free website we made through The Knot which allows for online RSVPs.  Though a lot of it was also done by word of mouth.  Venue was the in-laws’ backyard.  Decorated with christmas lights we already had.  Tables and chairs loaned to us by neighbors.  We had a local Italian restaurant cater for about $600 and had a ton of food left over.  We bought a sheet cake from the grocery store for like $70 and also had a ton of that left over.  And we bought our own alcohol, a large assortment of beers/wines/liquors/mixers at Costco for maybe $300 total and never ran out.  We probably overshot the amount we needed for food and drinks considering how much was left but it was my priority to not be stingy on that stuff and we still got it all for a bargain.  My outfit was thrifted from ebay and etsy for about $150.  My husband wore a suit he already owned.  I did my own hair and makeup.  No bridal party.  My dad performed a short ceremony.  We made a spotify playlist instead of hiring a DJ.  We opted out of hiring a photographer and asked family to take turns holding the camera for pictures.  My sister did all our couples shots on an iphone and they turned out amazing.  There were various other small expenses here and there like plates/forks/napkins, extra decorations I picked up on clearance, etc.  We stayed exactly within our budget and I’m very proud of what we put together.

Post # 40
Member
47136 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

I didn’t read all the responses, but wanted to share this in case here is somethig similar where you live.

Where I live, every year for the past ? years, they have had an event called Love in the Square. Wedding professionals including officiants, florists, event managers and photographers offer weddings for a donation to the food bank. You have to come prepared with your wedding license which will be a cost. You can bring all the people you want to witness the ceremony, but they will also provide witnesses if you don’t have or want guests.

The pictures are posed on their website as soon as they are ready, and you are free to download what you want. Most people go to a restaurant for brunch or lunch floowing the ceremony.

Check for any local FREE wedding events.

 

Post # 41
Member
130 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2016

We had a cheap wedding. We ran to court house and got our marriage license the day before, picked up my twin, her husband and my best friend, went to the bridge of the local rose garden and got married, with my Brother-In-Law as our offciant. No one was upset with us. Now, we are planning a vow renewal so we can have a big ceremony with our family and friends. Gave us time to save up so everything is perfect. 

Post # 42
Member
768 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2019

I feel awful that you feel like you need to caption your title with “no judgement”.

You will get none from me Bee. 

I can’t offer much advice on the lower end of the budget spectrum (ours is pretty mid-range at $20-$30k), only that if you’re booking something from the mainstream wedding market (like a photographer or limo), always go to an expo first as they tend to have great prices there

Post # 43
Member
834 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2017

I know you said you didn’t want to start a war with your family but being able to say no as an adult is a useful,  and necessary,  skill to have.  It sounds as if these relatives who would be so offended as to not be invited are not opening their wallets to help you pay so repeat this as often as necessary,  “while we would love to have you there we are keeping our wedding small due to financial reasons”  Let them be offended and just invite your immediate family. Or you could host people who would rather see  you throw yourself into more debt rather than host the wedding you can afford.   Your choice.  

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