Cheating husband???….

posted 2 years ago in Relationships
Post # 32
Member
2291 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2019 - Chateau Lake Louise

andy05 :  Just because his friend also has his wife snowed -or she’s in on it – doesn’t make any of this funny.

Craigslist is full of ridiculousness. Some of it is weird, and hilarious. His response doesn’t square with someone mocking something they found absurd. His are the actions of someone trying to hook up. End of story.

If he really found it funny, why weren’t you in on the joke? Hmmm? I find bizarre crap on the internet too, and I usually say, “OMG D… CHECK OUT THE INTERNET WEIRDOS” and we laugh, or recoil in horror, together.

This is not that. He was cruising for a hooker. Which, apart from being disloyal, shows a tremendous disregard for your safety. Cause people who get paid to have sex – and you can bet your sweet cookies that’s what that was – get Save-The-Date Cards. So do the people who pay them for sex. And often, so do the wives of people who pay people for sex. 

I’m sorry Bee. This is sad and upsetting and fundamentally icky. I’d clear out and cut your losses.

Post # 33
Member
12484 posts
Sugar Beekeeper

Yeah, no.

Maybe they are naive and believe his BS. Or are loyal to him no matter what. Who knows, who cares? For all you know he originally met THEM on Craigslist. 

Post # 34
Member
116 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: July 2008

andy05 :  

Yes he is cheating and trying to lie his way out of it.

I am so sorry this is happening to you.

I think cheaters are some of the worst people.

Post # 35
Member
1057 posts
Bumble bee

I wouldn’t be surprised if this wasn’t his first time seeking people out on Craigslist. That’s just gross. 

Post # 36
Member
466 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2018

Jokes on you, I’d be leaving. Sooooo funny that I’m laughing at the door. Bye! 👋🏻 

Post # 37
Member
9532 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2016

andy05 :  it’s insane his friends are pitching in.  But no.

Also, asking you not to tell his family and freinds while simultaneously asking his friends to cover for him… lovely.

Get a divorce, move back.  I’m so sorry bee, but cut your losses now.   

Post # 38
Member
992 posts
Busy bee

Leave him. Don’t even bother listening to the things he has to say, because he’s clearly willing to lie to you AND get his friend involved in lies to cover up his misdeeds. You cannot trust him, you cannot trust his friends to keep him “in check” or keep an eye out on him for you.  And, above all else, he’s putting your health at risk. I hate how people never take this stuff seriously. You CAN get sick from a cheating partner.  And no, they are NEVER “joking” when they sext some girl, e-mail prostitutes, or flirt on Instagram. This guy wasn’t even casually sexting/flirting to boost his ego, he was SHOPPING FOR SEX.  With someone who has an unknown history. And unknown partners. Who gets paid to do this.  If you threw our trust out the window, and were willing to put my life at risk over you needing to get laid outside of marriage, your head would spin with how fast I would end it.

You already know what you need to do and you already know who he is now.  Just get out.

Post # 39
Member
189 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

OMG I totally made a mistake and posted that I thought you wrote another post about this. My apologies!!

 

 

Post # 40
Member
743 posts
Busy bee

andy05 :  “IF you decide to stay together, you will wish you didn’t tell anyone about this, as it is a reflection on both of us.” ….Ok, I wouldn’t even know where to start with this! Not only does that sound way too close to a threat, he’s trying to make you think it will be a refleaction on you!? I have nothing against a person being a dom, but in now way is this game playing ok in my book. As for the friends trying to back him up that it was all a big joke, I’ve heard that one before. Lots of people will do this when a friend gets themselves in a jam to bail them out. I’m sorry this happened to you, I wouldn’t stay with this guy, and his being a dom has nothing to do with it. Not only does he sound untrustworthy, he sounds like a big time game player. You deserve better than all that. Please keep us posted, I’ll be thinking of you! Go find a better life than the one I expect you’ll have with this man. You can do it and you deserve better.

Post # 41
Member
743 posts
Busy bee

 btw- was thinking about this today and aven if he had done this as a joke, why would he really feel the need to keep a joke from you and then lie about it? Not much of a joke to begin with, but if it was really a joke, why keep it such a secret?

Post # 42
Member
122 posts
Blushing bee

Totally a normal joke, emailing randos on craigslist is something I do weekly *eyeroll*

Dudes a liar. 

Post # 43
Member
466 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2018

He doesn’t want you saying anything because rather it be a reflection of “us”, it’s about HIM. He doesn’t want his parents and family to find out the reason you left him is because he tried to cheat on Craigslist. He’s not looking out for you, just himself and his image.

Post # 44
Member
1246 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2018

What a horrific piece of absolute shit.  He’s beefing up his inner circle to try and convince as many people as possible that this was merely some joke to save himself from the shame of being found out.  You haven’t even left him yet and he’s already trying to frame you as the enemy!  

I would not be AT ALL surprised if this leads to actual abuse later in your life should you make the awful mistake of staying.  Don’t let him manipulate you into staying by trying to make you out as an enemy.  You’re not, and the people who believe him are just as sick and twisted and NOT of your concern. 

Post # 45
Member
366 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2019

 

What an ass!

He doesn’t know how to value you and only after 2 months of marriage, he goes off looking for a prostitute?? I can see him googling out of curiousity (which I actually did myself once, cos I was just curious) but if he actually REACHED OUT to her, that is totally a different issue altogether!

He even said that he wanted to meet during the day. That shows that he had every intention to cheat! He may not have, but he would have if you didn’t catch him redhanded!

I know it hurts. I know you’re in disbelief and sad but Get out now! Save yourself from a lifetime of dishonesty from this ass of a man!

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