Cheating husband???….

posted 2 years ago in Relationships
Post # 47
Member
743 posts
Busy bee

it’s up to you to decide what’s best for you. Just keep in mind that leaving can be a lot harder the longer you stay. The longer you stay the more likely you’ll have property together, children and so on. Just please consider what’s could be best for you and your happiness vs whether or not he actually cheated. Hope things work out well for you.

Post # 48
Member
11531 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2015

andy05 :  agree with keepingitreal8675309 :  – just want to add that you must also consider the message your behavior sends. So if you let this go with no consequence, you’re inadvertently sending the message that you will tolerate this. 

If you are planning on staying with him and want the best chance for success, make sure you take appropriate actions right now to protect yourself and out yourself/dignity/self esteem first. 

TBH, I have low hopes for him, but I’m just trying to help you given that it seems you’re looking for ways to make this okay. 

Post # 49
Member
1595 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2017

andy05 :  How did you get access to deleted texts? Verizon will not just give you deleted texts (aside from just a sent and received log with phone numbers and times – absolutely no content of messages) without a court order subpoena.

Post # 50
Member
2418 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2016

He’s snowing you. Look at his phone records. He should have been on the phone with his friend while he was sending dick pics to the prostitute, right? You know, because that’s what you do with your friends for *fun*. 

Post # 51
Member
425 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2017 - Canvas Event Space

FWIW my friend and I have made Craigslist ads for jokes, but 1. they were quite obvious they were jokes, 2. we made them, not responded to any with actual meet up requests and 3. not while or since either of us have been in relationships.

So seems a bit weird.

Also, definitely not impressed with that text message. Kind of gross, actually.

If you’re convinced now that it was just that one time and/or he possibly doesn’t know what a joke is, work through it together. Don’t let him speak to you like in that text or manipulate you, though. That’s almost more of a red flag than this incident tbh.

Post # 52
Member
2291 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2019 - Chateau Lake Louise

andy05 :  Also, what makes you think he doesn’t have other email accounts he hasn’t told you about? It takes about 2 minutes to make one. 

Do what you want, but this would not ally my fears at all.

Just saying. 

Post # 53
Member
20 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: July 2018

Guys, maybe he didn’t cheat.
Maybe he really was messing around with his friend and harrassing prostitute online.

Men do dumb shit when they’re together.

Post # 55
Member
5028 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: September 2017

One time cheater or habitual cheating, its still cheating in my book.  The fact you have not come across other instances of such behavior wouldn’t ease my concerns.  

He was intimate in his response by sending a photo of himself and considering he was defensive, asking you not to share this information with any friends or family leads me to believe his intentions were not honorable, not even joke worthy.

Post # 57
Member
20 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: July 2018

bridetobe2018 :  well, you never know. It’s kinda not fair for everybody to assume about something.

I don’t ever like to tell people they did something when I don’t have 100% proof.

I would tell OP to try to get him to spill the beans so she knows for sure.

Post # 58
Member
1246 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2018

anonbee4000 :  I totally agree with your latest response.  I was just concerned at first by the note that harassing a prostitute because boys will be boys is any less offensive. 

Post # 59
Member
2418 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2016

He’s lying & he’s despicable. I’d tell everyone you know what a scumbag he is & move back to Europe. 

Post # 60
Member
5028 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: September 2017

anonbee4000 :  Exactly what kind of evidence are you looking for?  There is an incriminating e-mail he sent, photo and all.  Seems like evidence to me.  If you are trying to prove what his intentions were, whatever they were they were not considerate to his wife.  A married man should not behave this way.  Theres plenty of harmless jokes that can be made with friends, this is not one of them.

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