check cashing etiquette?

posted 5 months ago in Etiquette
Post # 2
622 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2016

That’s weird. I don’t think I’ve ever received a thank you card before my check was cashed to be honest

Post # 3
7077 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2016

I’ve always heard that checks really should be cashed ASAP. I would not be following this “etiquette” rule for your family and friends. 

Post # 4
5255 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2014

financegal87 :  I agree with a PP – checks should be cashed immediately. There’s nothing worse than sending someone a check and them not cashing it and you not knowing when the money’s going to suddenly come out! 

Post # 5
893 posts
Busy bee

I’ve never heard of what your MIL and SIL are talking about. 

Post # 6
12103 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2014

Cash ’em ASAP. It’s annoying when people hold on to cheques forever.


Post # 7
5180 posts
Bee Keeper

financegal87 :  Cash the check immediately so that the family member can balance out or account for the money that will be withdrawn.  You’ve sent the thank you notes a week ago.

Post # 10
1185 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2017

I also think it should be cashed right away. The thank you can come after. When they give you any other gift, you receive the full gift (ie. the cash or object) before sending a card…

Post # 11
2436 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2017 - Valleybrook Country Club

financegal87 :  WHAT?! No… cash the check promptly. I HATE when people hold onto my check without cashing it. I mean I can understand waiting a few days or a week until you can get to the bank. I think that logic is ridiculous. I work in banking and I have seen people here the day after ther wedding/event depositing their checks. No way the thank you cards have been received a day or two out from the event. I think as long as you get the thank you card out in a reasonable amount of time, that is all. If you don’t cash the check and it bounces or something, what is the thank you card for then? Thanking someone means you’ve recieved their gift, so technically you haven’t really recieved your gift to thank them for with that logic…

Post # 12
1171 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2016

Think of it this way, do you refrain from using gifts until after the Thank you has been received? New towels sitting in the closet, still? Vases & photo frames left unused? 

Post # 13
1770 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2017

financegal87 :  ridiculous. Cash that checked the moment you receive it – i hate outstanding checks on my account. That said, i also write the thank you note right away. Like, i write the note, cash the check, and drop that note in the mail. 

Post # 14
1781 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

If I sent you a check for your wedding and got a thank-you card but the funds were not deducted from my account, I would be VERY confused.

Cash the checks and send a thank-you card right away. Your SIL is mistaken about etiquette and you do not need to abide by her opinion. 

Post # 15
141 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: July 2017

I’ve never heard of that, but in the circumstances I’d just abide by it for their side of the family since they’re gonna be that way about it. 

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