Post # 1
do any of you ladies still check up on your EX?
i still do from time to time and i dont know why. i definitly left him for a reason he was not a bad guy exept for the way things ended ( he cheated) and i will not tollorate that.
but hes married to the girl he started talking to right befor and after i broke it off with him.
but the relationship was going down hill for a few years before that. i had gained some weight and i wasn’t in school and i think he felt i was getting fat and going no where.
i think that’s the part that has hurt me for so long. and even Thur all the hurt of being left feeling like this ive always wished him well in life. him and his wife are perfect for each other shes younger, no kids and can move, travel and do what ever he wants when ever he wants.
i wish them the best. i have my FH who is perfect for me he has 2 boys and is into all the family stuff that goes with being a family with kids. but i never got closer from that last relationship i just feel embarrassed and i feel like im going no where and my ex was right to not want to be with me. i ended it and gave him his promise ring back. he tried to talk to me calling and calling but once i found out he was seeing his now wife i would not pick up the phone. and i never spoke to him again. life went on he married her after only maybe 2 years of them being together. that does not bother me at all im glad hes happy i didn’t want to be with him but for some reason i still feel like a loser for gaining the weight and not going to school and bettering myself then. its the reason the relationship fell apart. who wants to be with someone who’s going no where that’s how i feel he felt about me.
im glad hes happy and i as well am very happy with the man im going to marry.
i just have been trying to find a way to drop feeling like a loser who’s going no where.
Post # 3
you need closure.
you say you are happy for your ex but you need to be happy with yourself too. set yourself some goals to move forward with your life. focus on yourself and your life, not his.
Post # 4
I haven’t checked on my ex’s since I was like 22. I think you outgrow that or you have complete closure to no longer need that.
The fact you needed several paragraphs to explain this sitch is a red flag that you need to find some closure with him or yourself as a previously non-engaged woman.
Post # 5
I periodically run an online check on an ex; however he was abusive and it’s strictly to make sure that he’s a geographically safe distance from me. I have no emotional interest.
Post # 6
I check on my ex. But we were friends for almost a year and a half before we dated, and we still have a mutual friend (who will be getting engaged and married soon, and we’ll both be in the wedding party so…)
He ended up cheating on me. It was a long distance thing between us, and we were almost broken up alerady at that point. I was hurt and because I was super depressed at the time, took it terribly. Now I’m chill with it. We were great friends, but terrible partners.
Post # 7
I don’t check on mine; but, he started dating this girl that I was good friends with while I was in school, and she’s on my FB, so I get to see pictures of them together. I’m by no means jealous, but it is a little uncomfortable.
Post # 8
how do you check up on him? fb? just block him, then you can’t!
Post # 9
@mypinkshoes: you are so right and the first step not look at there face books.
i just wish there was a way to talk to him but i would never ever attempt contact my pride runs to high lol its not him your right i need to set goals for my self which i just finally got my G.E.D
and i’m getting ready to enroll in our local community collage as well.
I’m pushing my FH to go as well but we have 3 kids together so its not going to be easy.
i love my FH and i cant wait to move in and marry him but we have to start making some better $$$ i do good i bar tend so i make great money but i cant do it forever and i hate my job i looove the $$$$
Post # 10
@StephieBee: you said it perfect ; ) but im truly happy for him and her i love my FH so much.
i just need to feel good about myself its been 6 years since the split i usually walk right away from relationships in the past but this one i guess has made me question myself. i think thats whats bugging me. caz when i see his picture i dont feel hurt or hate or love or anything but that i hope hes happy and i wish i could tell him that. i shouldent have shut him out the way i did but its too late now 6 years has gone by.
Post # 11
@MrsWBS: yeah but then they will see that there on my blocked list and think im crazy lmfao thats not cool. i wish i could forget there names lol ahh ill cut it out and stop all on my own lol
Post # 12
@HisNightOwl2014: How old are you? No judgement, but when I was even just a little bit younger, it was harder for me not to peek in on my ex’s because I was still sort of floudering in figuring out who I was or what I wanted…(I’m only 24)
Post # 13
@piacavoleKt: I’m 39 i guess with age it doesn’t get any easier finding out who you are lol i know who i want to be i just need to get there ; ) i dont know why i check on him. i wish him well and even tho the relationship ended badly we were friends it hurt at the time more that he betrayed me by cheating and i felt the whole relationship was a lie and everything he said to me.
the relationship lasted 41/2 years in my book 3 years longer then it should have.
i tried to leave him due to me/us being unhappy but he would beg and cry so i would stay.
but in the end he knew he did wrong and should have let me end it when i wanted to.
that’s the part that got me so mad i was with him all Thur his collage hiss AA and hid BA
and then i felt like i was traded in for a younger women with no kids.
i always felt like he felt that my son was in the way of me following him where ever he wanted to go or do in life that’s why i tried to end it a few times plus i really didn’t love him like i should have. i wanted out and didn’t know how he would cry and tell me ill never find better then him. that ill end up with some broke guy. how vain ans judgemental of him money is not everything. me and my FH are very happy together i have a partnership with him that ive never had with anyone else ; ) hes my best friend.
Post # 14
I agree with MrsWBS. I have officially blocked all of my exs and one of them I blocked the girl he cheated on me with. I also blocked my fiance’s ex because she did a lot of really f’ed up things and I have to pay for them and I got a little tipsy one night and almost sent her a really mean thing but I blocked her instead.
Post # 15
@ihavethemusicinme: i would do that but that wont help me from looking them up its me not them. im trying to find a way to shake this feeling on “im going no where” in life feeling ; ( this has nothing to do with them im glad there happy she is perfect for him and i glad hes happy and iam very happy with my FH. this has everything to do with me. i look on his facebook and i feel bad about myself for not being further in school and still being at the same job i was back 6 years ago i feel like i havent moved im just still in the same spot in life and i feel far from my goals and dreams. and getting older does not help lol ahhhhhh ; (
Post # 16
Well there is one ex that I end up seeing almost everytime I fly back home. He still works at the same place he did and they are the only store that carries this one beer that I love. When I used to end up seeing him it made me feel better about my life. But I never did and never will regret leaving him and going to school.
I do think you need to try to get some closure. I’m not sure how you can create that but maybe just try focusing on yourself. I mean I felt bad for a while on how I let myself be in that abusive relationship with an ex but I worked on getting better and I have a much better life now. The only thing left over is the weight struggle really.
It sounds like you have taken some steps to resolve the issues you had back then, so perphaps following down this path will help you get some closure.