Thanks ladies. I wanted to make sure I wasn’t overreacting because I felt blindsided by this or being out of line by expecting children in the wedding party to be included in the reception before I speak to them. I want to talk to them in person this weekend. Both the bride and groom tend to not speak their minds if they think others won’t like the opinion, then get upset about it later, so it is a better in person conversation.
So – the “grapevine” was through the bride’s mother. The bride’s sister’s child is also in the wedding. The sister assumed her child (the bride’s nephew/ring bearer) was invited to the reception. Apparently, when the bride found out she was very upset and drama ensued with the sister. She went to her mom, who was trying to find a soluation to keep both her daughters happy, when she called and asked if they could share my sitter. I was surprised, because I assumed we didn’t need one.
The invites haven’t arrived yet. I can’t remember how the Save the Date was addressed, but I’m going to assume to all of us because otherwise I would’ve asked about it!
I talked to my brother about this early on, just after they asked us all to be in the wedding party. His attitude was its all up to me, if I want my child there or not. It was over a year ago, and I said I couldn’t make that call right now, but would think about it as the date approached.
My parents are well aware of the sitter issues (they’ve been helping me try to find someone) and they also were under the impression that all three of us were invited and if I wanted to have a sitter, it was my call. I’d originally planned to have a sitter for the second half of the reception (aka. post bedtime), but when my sitter didn’t work out, I decided to forgo it.
As far as bringing our sitter – this is at the beginning of the school year for my area, and would require the sitter to miss school on (at least) Friday to arrive in time. She is also involved in extra curriculars and could impact her tryouts. I don’t think I can ask for that, or, to be honest, afford the tickets and extra hotel room for her.
Thank you to those who mentioned using the sitter services before. I have been reluctant to use them, but will have to look into them more.