(Closed) Childfree BINGO!

posted 10 years ago in No Kids
Post # 31
Member
2850 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

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Polyphemus:  

My kind of lady!

Post # 32
Member
294 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2000

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MrsBroccoli:  I guess I’m just really lucky. I’d get nada. No one gives a toss about what is or isn’t going on in my uterus. But then, I don’t care about anyone else’s either. 

Post # 33
Member
6375 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: July 2013 - UK

We want children. We just don’t feel the need to annouce the fact loudly to the world IRL.

So far, I have had a1, a3, a5, c1, d1, d2, e2 and e3, as well as variations on b3 and b5. The main offender is Mother-In-Law. Some of these things sting because we are having some TTC issues, which she doesn’t know about.

However, there should also be a chart which shows some of the things which smug childless people say to people who want to become parents one day, because I bet I’ve heard plenty of those as well. Let’s start with the term “breeder” for one, so proudly and offensively topping an otherwise amusing chart.

Post # 34
Member
5521 posts
Bee Keeper

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Rachel631:  I don’t know any childfree people who make smug or snide comments unless antagonised. I’ve said some harsh things to people, but it’s been after they’ve berated me for ages about the fact I don’t want children and a polite attempt to change the subject or tell them you don’t wish to discuss it has gone ignored.

As for the term ‘breeder’: I do not know ANYONE, including the pretty ‘militant’ childfree people I know, who would say this IRL. Many don’t use it at all, myself included. And those who do use it use it to differentiate between different types of parents: so, a good parent, who is responsible and raises their child properly, would be referred to as just that – a parent. Whereas someone who pops out child after child despite being oin benefits, who does not instill discipline or a sense of responsibility in their children, and who generally acts very entitled just because they’ve done what most animals can do and produced offspring, might, by some, be referred to as a ‘breeder’. And TBH while it isn’t a term I use as I said (although I can certainly think of other terms: irresponsible moron and entitled twat being two), I can see why people do, and provided it stays in the CF community, I don’t see a massive issue.

Post # 35
Member
6375 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: July 2013 - UK

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barbie86:  I’ve had it used twice in the past six months alone. The most offensive usage was an especially tactless friend. The conversation went something like this:

Her: So, are you thinking of having kids then?

Me: Yes, I think so.

Her: When?

Me: Soon, we hope.

Her: Huh.

Me: What?

Her: I never had you figured for a breeder.

Me: Eh?

Her: I mean, I never thought you were an irresponsible or a selfish person. I always thought you would be open to adoption.

Now… I know her, and she doesn’t mean it badly (plus she is totally tactless), so I do try to keep my mouth shut, but that really hurt. My mother has also made some very offensive comments to me about why I shouldn’t have children. Unfortunately, she is a “tact free zone” as well.

Post # 37
Member
713 posts
Busy bee

UPDATE!

My OP (mentioned above) was “closed” by admin bc I apparently posted it in the wrong section. If you were a part of the OP and/or would like to join in and show support, then please follow the new URL from the “IDEAS” section:

http://weddingbee.uservoice.com/forums/241844-submit-your-idea/suggestions/11136888-new-board-section-needed

Also, be sure to VOTE (3 is best if you really agree with the initiative) if you want to see this put through. Voting is the best way to be heard here, but feel free to leave a comment if you want to as well.

Thanks, everyone! 😀

Post # 38
Member
2981 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: City, State

I3

N5

These are the only two I haven’t had. 

Post # 39
Member
227 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

This bingo board should include “you don’t know real love until you have children” …

Post # 40
Member
1030 posts
Bumble bee

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MrsBroccoli:  haha, i’ve gotten pretty much all of these. the dumbest by far is the “what if your parents hadn’t had kids”, to which i always respond (in my head, haha) “well, then i wouldn’t be having this dumbass conversation.”  lol, i’d love to actually say that but i’m too conflict averse. 

Post # 41
Member
175 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2017

Interesting, I have gotten none of these. Do I win for that?

My parents actually I think might be relieved at not being grandparents although maybe I think their friends might comment and bring it up. I am an only child and my dad wasn’t big on kids, plus they live really far. I just have that odd family that is like “whatever”.

Friends comments? What friends? Women my age all have kids and I recently moved so no friends to speak of yet. I think most must assume I have chosen my career, or I give a great resting b**ch face as Fiance would say.

I pretty much would say, when I ever comment or divulge my personal stance/preference I do it with a conviction that broaches no questions or comments 🙂

Post # 42
Member
637 posts
Busy bee

I’ve gotten “you’ll change your mind” essentially. A woman overheard me talking to a friend about how I do not want kids, and she whipped around and said, “I said that where I was your age, too, but now I have four kids.” Great for you, lady. I’m not going to make the same decision (or mistake). I’ve gotten other comments, but I really don’t get them often which is surprising considering where I live.

My family wasn’t even surprised when I said I didn’t want kids, lol. I’m the black sheep in the family, so I don’t think much would surprise them. My SO gets told all the time that he is selfish for not wanting kids… by other men, no less.

I usually don’t bring it up, but whenever I am asked about it, usually by female doctors (many of whom have kids themselves), they are always nice about it and don’t give me any crap for it. I feel lucky after reading so many people’s negative experiences.

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