(Closed) Childfree By Choice (CFBC) Board Needed!

posted 6 years ago in Married Life
Post # 361
Member
816 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2017

This is a wonderful idea! I would be an active participant if such a board existed!

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Mrs. Mouse:  Thank you for the updates!

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MelissainNC:  Wonderful and honest post, kudos to you! ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 362
Member
745 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: January 2016

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MelissainNC:  I wish to give you all the hugs. This is exactly why we are lobbying for a space on WB. Perspectives like your would be missed if we were on a CF only forum. Thank you so much for your honesty and willingness to share.

Post # 363
Member
868 posts
Busy bee

Why on earth would any one be so strongly against having a CFBC board? Would we be against a single parent forum (do we have one?)? Why such an unmeasured responce to this request? 

Women who do choose to have children often face a lot of discrimination in the workplace. There’s a lot of “oh, you’re a mother, so you don’t take your career seriously” whcih never seems to happen to men who are fathers? Well — women who choose NOT to have children get a lot of discrimination too. Apparently this thread is proof of that. I never thought that WB would be part of that. I thought that WB was a fairly neutral, non political, and pro-inclusion discussion forum. I applaud WB for having a LGBT forum, for having an “encore” forum, for having forums dedicated to less common faiths, etc. How on earth can not having a child be *soooooo* alternative, that it’s excluded?

Having a CFBC board seems to be 100% consistant with what WB is already offering. I am baffled that this is even an issue? 

Post # 364
Member
868 posts
Busy bee

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MelissainNC:  I think your post is brave! 

I too am a fence sitter. We debate not having kids at all vs maybe adopting one day. We refuse to be pressured into having kids we can’t afford. We have no real urge to reproduce and adoption takes the time-line element out of having a child. 

We don’t consider this to be “settling” for adopted kids. Adoption is our plan A. No kids at all is our plan B. 

Post # 368
Member
224 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2017

When I look at the petition under “Ideas,” it doesn’t say that it is under review, the way some of them do. Hopefully that’s just a tech update that hasn’t been made yet.

I do think it’s odd that the idea for a “Guests” subcat, with only 10 votes, DOES show as under review, as does “Step-Parents” with only 21 votes, and “Adoption” with 43. (I do think those would all be good subboards to have, but the fact that they were being considered seriously before the CFBC board, which is nearing 1000 votes, seems odd.)

Post # 369
Member
5 posts
Newbee

I’m CFBC. I’m not married yet so I haven’t had any issues, but I already know I don’t want kids. Maybe it’s because I haven’t experienced the negativity yet, but I just don’t really understand the need for a whole forum on it. Once I’m married, I’m probably going to leave the site. I have nothing to talk about in the TTC boards, so I doubt I’ll stick around. If I have any issues being CFBC I’d probably seek out a community for specific to that but I’m not going to hang around and post about how I’m CFBC… Maybe a separate forum makes sense here, I don’t hang around here a lot. But I guess I just don’t fully get all this hype. 

To comment on the post above, I also don’t get the need for step-parents and adoption as those I feel could go under other categories as well and they aren’t hugely talked about. Guests makes sense to me though because that’s wedding related and it’s a wedding forum, and I see TONS of posts about guests that don’t fit anywhere else (Ex. I’m a guest, can I wear this outfit? – that doesn’t really fit anywhere).

Post # 371
Member
224 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2017

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anonldrbee: Maybe it’s because I haven’t experienced the negativity yet, but I just don’t really understand the need for a whole forum on it.

Exactly – you haven’t experienced it yet, or the general discrimination that can happen in life because of it. If you’d like to understand the need for a specific subboard on this topic, read back in this thread a bit. Many people have posted on that quite eloquently.

I also don’t get the need for step-parents and adoption as those I feel could go under other categories as well and they aren’t hugely talked about.

Actually, both of those categories have their own unique issues and joys, and they are both talked about a GREAT deal.

Post # 372
Member
5 posts
Newbee

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rfs23:  But my point is that step-parents and adoption could go in other places. When I say they aren’t hugely talked about, I mean when you go under the parenting board, it’s not flooded with posts relating to step-parenting, or the babies forum isn’t flooded with adoption posts. In that case, it would make sense to organize them separately. Yeah people post about them often but I don’t think it’s really been an ISSUE that it they don’t have their own forum. I’m not arguing that we don’t need separate forums for these things, I’m just saying I can see why there wasn’t one to begin with. In my honest opinion, wedding bee has too many forums as it is – but I’m use to smaller message boards that are more generic. When posting a topic here (especially as a newbie) it takes a lot of time to go through the list of forums to figure out where I need to post my question.

Post # 373
Bee
5113 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: September 2009 - Barr Mansion

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rfs23:  Hmm, I didn’t realize it wasn’t officially listed as under review. It probably has to do with the fact that I merged two ideas together after marking it as under review. I’ll fix that when I get a chance. It doesn’t change the fact that the idea is currently under review by Admin.

Post # 375
Member
1752 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: February 2015

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MelissainNC:  Thanks so much for sharing!

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