(Closed) Childfree Section of the Community

• ChemistryBride
• 9 years ago

• Wedding: May 2012

@heathaah:  You implied that discussing “no children at wedding” posts on a child free board would turn it into an anti-children board, thus making it clear that you think no children at wedding is an anti-child sentiment and something bad

• MrsSl82be
• 9 years ago

• Wedding: October 2009

@ChemistryBride:  thank you!

• heathaah
• 9 years ago

• Wedding: September 2009

@ChemistryBride:   Still no.

For those of you who missed my point completely….

I said COMBINING all posts about “no kids” (whether not wanting them yourself, or not wanting them at your wedding, whatever) makes the board an anti-kid board.  Anti-kid, meaning “including anything that involves no kids.” 

Is it that hard to understand?  Really????

• heathaah
• 9 years ago

• Wedding: September 2009

Do any of you know if I had kids at my own wedding or not???

Are the boards this boring this morning that you need to be on the attack like this?

 

• MrsSl82be
• 9 years ago

• Wedding: October 2009

@heathaah:  the way you wrote it, apparently it is.

Its just ridiculous, people who want babies can have their own place here, WHY IS THERE SUCH AN ISSUE WITH US GETTING OUR OWN SPACE???? How will this affect you in any way, shape or form? Seriously people?????

• ChemistryBride
• 9 years ago

• Wedding: May 2012

This post has gotten a bit ridiculous. I think there should definitely be a separate section for DINK, Childfree, CBC, whatever you want to call it. And I voiced my opinion on the idea thread.

I have seen enough harassment that the CBC people get by some of the TTC crowd, and it’s wrong. And unsuprisingly, some of that crowd are in this thread harassing about why this board is not needed. This board is needed so CBC people can voice their opinions somewhere other than the babies/ttc/pregnancy boards and get this type of outrage that they want a child-free lifestyle!

Just FYI, I don’t have children yet and won’t for a few years, but I love children and want them desperarately, and I am not offended that others don’t and want a place that they are less likely to be judged for that.

I really don’t get why people are so against it, it will keep those who are so offended by those who don’t want children from seeing as many topics that are Child free related.

• barbie86
• 9 years ago

I really don’t see your logic.

You might as well say that combining ‘ALL Christian’ posts on the same board makes the board anti-Muslims/Hindu/Sikh/Pagan.

Or that combining ALL lesbian/gay posts on one board makes them ‘anti straight’.

The logic just does not follow. At all.

Having a child-free board is not at all the same as having an ‘anti-children’ board. Such a statement also (very ignorantly and narrow-mindedly) suggests that all CFers are anti-children, whereas in fact, plenty of CFers like children: many CFers I know work with children, or have nieces and nephews that they enjoy spending time with, etc.

To suggest a CF board is simply ‘anti children’ is to spectaularly miss the point, and to fail to understand all the issues that come with being CF, including dealing with prejudice.

• heathaah
• 9 years ago

• Wedding: September 2009

I think it is just that the babies board is a whole lot of topics.  I am not against you having your own space in any way.  I just don’t see (and please explain if you can) after reading this thread, how the topics you would discuss don’t fall under other categories.  How can I be “against” a board added on here?  How will that affect my daily life?  It won’t!  We were asked what our opinions were, and I said I don’t see the need.

But since I wouldn’t frequent it, it doesn’t “bother” me in any way what-so-ever to have it.

But I still don’t think “wedding-related” no-children posts should be included.  I think it should be a “nesting” no children board.

• hisgoosiegirl
• 9 years ago

• Wedding: January 1993

@barbie86:  what if, (just for argument’s sake) some of the CF’s are anti-children. What is wrong with that? Not everyone has to love little kids, and that’s ok.I just don’t even kinda get why this is such a huge deal. If people don’t find it necessary, don’t read that board. End of story.

 

Again, this is from someone who wants lots of little sticky-fingered children in the future and will probably eventually annoy many Bees with my ttc/pregnancy questions.

• beekiss
• 9 years ago

• Wedding: November 2013

@heathaah:  I kind of get what you’re saying.  However, it’s annoying for those of us who want to remain childfree to have to filter through all the parenting and child-related posts to find like-minded people who don’t want children.  So just because something can be posted in a multitude of areas, doesn’t mean that’s easy for those of us to search for all the related childfree posts unless it’s in one area.  Plus it’s easier for us to follow along with each of our stories if we aren’t present when one person posts.  Much the same way with the infertility and trying to conceive boards, it’s a sensitivity issue as well.  A lot of people are tired of being accused of insensitivity or being wrong that it’d be nice to know we have one safe place, an outlet if you will to discuss it.  Yes, it may not stop the attacks, but at least we know we can band together and get to know each other in one location.

• heathaah
• 9 years ago

• Wedding: September 2009

@barbie86:  Never said that either.  Wow.  I said the board would become an “anti-children” board with all those various “no kid” topics included.

 

 

• heathaah
• 9 years ago

• Wedding: September 2009

@beekiss:  I totally get that. 

My main point was 2 things:

1. I see the things fitting into other categories, (but I do get what

@beekiss:  is saying)

2. I don’t think the posts about not wanting kids at your wedding belong in the same category.

• plantains
• 9 years ago

• Wedding: July 2011

I definitiely think there should be a childfree board, why not? There are boards for everything under the sun so why not childfree?

 

That said, I agree with

@heathaah:  in that I do not think the issue of whether to invite children to a wedding or not belongs on that board. It belongs under ettiquette or reception or ceremony or whatever. Being CBC has nothing to do with whether you want to invite kids to your wedding or not. There tons of CBC people who choose to have kids at their wedding and tons of people pregnant, TTC or whatever who chose not to have kids at their wedding. If people ask a question on a public internet message board about their wedding then they are going to get all kinds of responses from people with varying opinions on the matter. This is true of anything. If one is already certain the wedding will not include children, then why ask for opinions?

If it is just a post about invitation wording and it specifically states that it isn’t asking for opinion then by and large people tend to respect that so I do not see what the problem is.

• heathaah
• 9 years ago

• Wedding: September 2009

@plantains:  Thank you for wording it much better that I could!!

• beekiss
• 9 years ago

• Wedding: November 2013

@heathaah:  I agree, I don’t see how having wedding-related posts in the childfree by choice section.  I do however see that just because something fits into a category, doesn’t mean that it’s fair to say there’s no demand for it.  It’s hurtful to say just because trying-to-conceive or fertility fits into the overall babies that the women who are sensitive to the pregnancy posts don’t have merit in wanting their own board area.  This is very similar.