Post # 16
kes18 : I understand, but what I’m wondering is if this was in response to being told they do not want kids at the wedding itself. And it’s possible that’s what she meant-that she’s bringing them to the destination. That much, the couple does not have control over. I agree.
Post # 17
khaleesi13 : yes, the cousin can say “I’m bringing my kids with me” but then not bring them to the wedding part (which is just a few hours) and that should be fine with the OP because she can’t dictate someone else’s vacation. I’m not sure if that is what she meant but it could be possible.
Post # 18
kes18 : Exactly. I was just hoping for a little bit more context about what this particular guest was told, and what exactly they meant.
Post # 19
I had a domestic Destination Wedding (5-7hrs driving), and no kids. We had several people decline because of it, and we were totally ok with that and understood. However, I think if you are expecting people to leave their newborn and 3 year old at home to come party with you you are going to be disappointed. You will likely have a lot more declines and it is up to you whether you want to accept those declines or change your vision to have children there.
Post # 20
As long as you’re cool with people not coming then do what you want.
But now your Fiance has opened a floodgate and it seems like he really isn’t 100% on board with the no kids idea in the first place or he wouldn’t be trying to justify it.
Post # 21
annabananabee : Totally agree with you. Obviously if you know there are certain issues with particular kids, that’s one thing, but to make the general assumption all children invited to a wedding will be screaming and crying and running around is pretty insulting to the parents. We had about 15 kids under the age of 10 at our wedding (youngest was about 18 months) and I didn’t hear a peep out of ANY of them during our loooong Catholic ceremony. And the older ones tore it up on the dance floor- it was adorable.
Maybe some of them got cranky, I wouldn’t know- because the adults invited knew how to be parents and remove their children from the situation.
Also while our wedding was in the location we live now it was effectively a destination wedding for pretty much everyone we invited who had kids. I wouldn’t have dreamed of asking them to try to figure out multi-day childcare arrangements on top of having to travel (for some, halfway across the country).