(Closed) Chinese Brides and White Flowers

posted 10 years ago in Flowers
Post # 3
Member
111 posts
Blushing bee

It depends on which flowers you use i think. flowers similar to carnations i think are bad. but i am using calla lillies and i got the a-ok from good old grandma. they will be lined on the aisle of the ceremony and all my girls will have calla bouquets. i also asked her if i could have the white envelopes for my invites and she said ok to that as well, AFTER asking if i could get red instead hehe. 

Post # 4
Member
359 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 1969

As much as my family is very westernized (ie born and raised in NY), my mom said no white flowers as well. I believe this a tradition embedded pretty deeply in the chinese culture.

In addition, my Future Mother-In-Law was very against our use of Aqua Blue and Navy Blue in our color scheme, in particular the invitations. Apparently it brings a bad omen to the receiver of the invitation and she went so far as to call Navy Blue "Dead Person Blue" in cantonese. In the end, it was easier to change the color scheme then go to battle over a color. It made all the mothers happy.

I would suggest maybe changing the colors to soft peaches, pinks and you can mix creams in maybe. But after weeks of discussion, I wasn’t able to find a way around the issue. ‘

 Goodluck though! Let me know how it turns out.

Post # 6
Member
359 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 1969

im sorry! I didn’t mean to worry you!

It’s just what my Future Mother-In-Law said to us. I am not sure if it’s true or she just said that to get us to change the color scheme

My parents are Taiwanese and they’ve never heard of the navy blue thing. In the end, whether its true or not, we had to change our colors.

If your mother hasn’t said anything about the navy blue STD, I wouldn’t bring it up. hahaha

Post # 7
Member
96 posts
Worker bee

My parents didn’t care, but I knew if I had everything white my grandma might not like it very much, so I did a mix of colors.  I think type of flower also makes a difference.  Some are more "white" than others.  Callas can be white or creamy white with a colored throat, while pure white carnations or roses can be very stark in contrast.  Also, you can always add a bit of color with ribbon embellishments on the stems, etc. I ended up doing whites and creams with soft yellow/green (green hypernicum berries, etc.)  mixed in, and I honestly think everything looked better because of the added color.

Post # 8
Member
41 posts
Newbee

I’m Cantonese also.  My grandmother always told us not to wear white or dark colors (black, dark blue) in our hair, saying that red was better, but my parents haven’t said anything about navy blue being bad for a wedding

Post # 9
Member
84 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: October 2007 - Ceremony at a cement and stained glass cathedral and reception at a boutique hotel ballroom

I’m also Cantonese and my mom’s only requirement for the wedding was no white flowers. She’s really not that traditional (she even wanted me to wear a white cheongsam), but I think she thought the white flowers would upset the older generations. I ended up going with bright pink flowers and they really looked wonderful in the pictures.

Post # 11
Member
238 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2008 - St. Catherine of Genoa, Jin Asian Cuisine Restaurant

Hi ladies, I guess I throw my hat in. 🙂

White and blue flowers worn in your hair would be bad. That’s what they do at weddings, so I can see why white flowers in your hair would definately bad. In regards to using white flowers otherwise, I was told only PURE white flowers are "funeral flowers." If the whites have the tiniest but of color in them they should be okay.

Also, dark blue is a funeral color as well, but I think some people have started to care less about that – most people look good in blue! My idea of having blue invitations, however, was turned down.

Post # 12
Member
66 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: May 2018

Does IVORY count as white?  I just bought a beautiful ivory hair flower and have a sinking feeling that it may not be okay. 

Post # 13
Member
46 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: December 1969

Wow, I thought I was the only one with this problem. I’m born here so I thought my parents would be pretty Westernized.  When my Fiance and I started planning our wedding, we asked our parents what they wanted.  They told us that if we were in China, there would be tons of traditions, but since we were in the US, that as long as we had a tea ceremony, they didn’t care about anything else.   Um, well, they started pulling traditions out of their butts!  We are now having a tea ceremony, red invitations with gold writing (we were originally going to do ivory and blue), and no white flowers in my hair.  

  

Post # 15
Member
260 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2008

Yeah I’m chinese and been getting a lot.  No blue anywhere in the wedding for the same reasons above, reminds them of death… so does giving clocks, anything in 4’s including number of bridesmaids.   Try Ivory, it’s technically not white, you can see what she thinks. 

Post # 16
Member
95 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: June 2008

yeah!  I just bought an ivory flower with feathers for my hair.  i wonder if that’s ok??

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