(Closed) Chipping in for bridesmaid dresses

posted 5 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 16
Member
236 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 2017

I see it as this: here in the U.K. bridesmaids dresses are paid for by the bride/groom/whoeverspayingforthewedding. Would I be happy spending $225 dollars per bridesmaid? Hell no! So I don’t see why $225 just for the dress is very affordable for each bridesmaid to be putting towards effectively someone else’s wedding. Unless they’re rolling in it and don’t give a damn I guess? 

Post # 17
Member
1425 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2021

View original reply
ethereal594 :  I agree, I always find it so odd that people are basically ordered to buy a dress so they can be part of someone’s wedding. Puts a lot of pressure on people because no one wants to be the only bridesmaid saying “No I can’t afford that”. 

Taking into account that this is normal in the US, I still think $225 is far too much (unless they have agreed individually that this is their budget), weddings cost a lot as it is, if you want them to wear an expensive dress you should foot the bill imo. 

Post # 18
Member
150 posts
Blushing bee

In the UK the bride pays for the bridesmaid dresses, hair, make up, shoes, Jewellery, Alterations. But if I was a bridemaid, i’d be supremely annoyed that my friend expected me to shell out $225 for a dress.

Although I hear its quite normal to expect bridemaids to shell out close to $1000 per wedding in the US. As its not just the dress, they pay for Alterations, hair, shoes, Bridal Shower, Hen Do. Then a hotel on the night of the wedding perhaps. A gift for each of the events. I could never ask my friend to spend that, but if its normal then I suppose thats what they signed up for when they agreed to be Bridemaids.

Perhaps a good way to think of it, is put yourself in their shoes. Would you want to spend that? Then you have the answer.

Post # 19
Member
2689 posts
Sugar bee

View original reply
pnp2014 :  I’ll be quite honest – that is still a large amount to expect your bridesmaids to pay…..also depends on alterations, shoes, hotel, gift expectations, etc. I personally would choose not to be in your wedding if I had to pay that much for a dress and would not expect my girls to fork over that amount of money either. But that’s just me. Depends on where your bridesmaids are sitting and what they’re comfortable with though. 

Post # 20
Member
2141 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2017

this is so american… only in a country where you demand other people pay could you even remotely think $285/$235/$225 (or even $200) is an appropiate amount

here in countries where the bride pays youll notice its much cheeper, unless you rich with a huge budget no one would dream of having like american sized bridal parties at $200 per dress lol

americans are crazy on there expectations, my wedding dress only costs $150 or so more than what your asking of your bridesmaids, my bridesmaids outfits which will be completely paid for by me are only $40

Post # 21
Member
2141 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2017

View original reply
wellswed9 :  I agree £1000 is 1/5 of our wedding budget and I cant believe theres a culture that thinks its ok to force their friends to pay their wedding costs and for their choices

Ive certainly never spent close to that for a wedding other than my own wedding and frankly I couldnt even if I had no sense and thought it was acceptable, if it was expected here I think the person would be supprised at how few people actually showed up while they say alone at their wedding

Post # 22
Member
3749 posts
Sugar bee

That is way too much. Talk to your bridesmaids and agree on a price everyone is comfortable with, or pay for them yourself. I paid for mine except the shoes, which was an open choice, as long as the shoes were somewhere in the beige/tan color family.

For others who have commented or thought we’re all crazy over here: keep in mind that this board is not representative of most brides/weddings in the US. I can count zero people I know that did as much as I see going on here (on other posts) and frankly shake my head at what some expectations are.

Post # 23
Member
2141 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2017

View original reply
katebluestone :  oh im sure not all americans are the same but whats presented as the mass culture is what we have to base it on

I dont know if its true (or where your based) but ive heard the midwest have a more UK-esq approach to weddings, im sure each area of america has complete differences as the ‘tradition’ are more likely to be governed by the original settlers traditions and certain groups/races/religons settled more prominatly into certain areas

Post # 26
Member
9639 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2013

i told my girls i was giving them $100 towards their dresses.  i took them to a place where dresses ranged from $79 to $179.  i told them they could pick any dress, i didn’t care if there were all the same or all different.

as long as it was the same color.

i also paid for hair and makeup for those who wanted it.

and then gave them a gift.

 

$200+ is a lot of money for a dress that they will most likely wear once. i would not be happy if my friend was making me spend this kind of money.

Post # 27
Member
218 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2016

I’m in the U.S., born and raised. I think it’s ridiculous to ask people to be in your wedding and then shell out a ton of money for the “honor”. I bought my bridesmaid dresses. It was factored into our budget from the beginning. 

Post # 28
Member
2617 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2016

I think that is still too much money.  I would be unhappy spending anything over $150.  (I would be ‘happy’ with anything under $80, to be honest, but that’s a long shot to get less than that, I know)  You pitching in certainly helps, but I think you’d need to pitch in more.  Could you do $100 per bridesmaid?  I’d also try to get an actual budget.  Them tell you anything is fine, concerns me that they have a low budget, but aren’t comfortable telling you that.

The topic ‘Chipping in for bridesmaid dresses’ is closed to new replies.

Find Amazing Vendors