(Closed) Choosing an Officiant

posted 8 years ago in Ceremony
Post # 3
5263 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2012

I know exactly where you’re coming from! Neither R nor I is religious anymore, and we felt our ceremony would be less meaningful if we had to grimace through religious readings/Bible verses we don’t believe to be holy.

Check out this site, as recommended to me when I asked the same question. I love their officiants, and they’ve been so helpful!



Post # 4
333 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

Fiance and I are going through the same thing.  Literally, this is the last major thing we need in place.  We are going to ask an aquantance who is a Chaplain and then go from there.  Have you thought about having a outgoing friend become ordained as something legal to marry you?  Check you state laws but many states allow this and it would be more personal.  (this is still an option being tossed around…)

Post # 5
1079 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

How about a unitarian minister if there is such a thing? Unitarians are welcoming of all people and they are strong on community and being moral ethical people with no God required (at least that’s my understanding). That seems like a good way to start your life together. We are having a Jewish wedding but placing a lot of emphasis on the being-good-people part of things.

Post # 6
118 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

Someone already suggested Celebrants, which is the Institute where I was trained (I’m a wedding officiant / Celebrant).  We stick to our script, you get full approval before hand, and we NEVER go on any kind of tangents or ad lib (OK, sometimes I might make a little joke, but it’ll be totally appropriate!).

Most of my clients do find me via Google or TheKnot or WeddingWire or even Weddingbee, sometimes, and we meet to discuss the ceremony AND to make sure that we click and can work well together.  It’s important.  Part of my job is to be your guide and friend during the whole wedding planning, and make sure that you ceremony goes as smoothly as possible.

And all of this stuff I’ve talked about is Celebrant stuff – so almost any Celebrant you’d have at your ceremony would follow the same guidelines and work with you, just like this too.  You can learn more about Celebrants and my ceremonies, too, but visiting my website.

Make sure to ask your officiant:

If you can write your owns vows.

If you can see the ceremony before hand.

How they write your wedding ceremony (is it custom? Can you edit it? Do they just put your names into a standard ceremony?)

Can we leave out God?

Do you have any references?

Can I see some of your ceremonies?

Hope this helps! PM if you have any other questions 🙂


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