(Closed) Choosing Bridesmaids

posted 7 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 2
7638 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

My suggestion, for what it is worth, is to have his 2 cousins as ushers or doing a reading. That way you only need 3 on each side. Or have those 2 cousins as ushers and maybe ask the 2 friends to do a reading each, depending on how the next year pans out.

You haven’t explained the nature of the drama; or how much you expect to do with your bridesmaids. But I do know from reading these boards that you don’t want drama queens in the bridal party. I was very happy to only have 2 on each side: my two were my sister and my best friend. With only those 2, I didn’t feel bad about not having some very good college or church friends as bridesmaids.

Post # 3
7305 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2011 - Bed & Breakfast

If there is drama now, it’s almost guaranteed to be worse during active wedding planning. You really do not need to choose maids until 6-8 months before the wedding. If I were you, I would wait until January-February 2015 to make this decision. Soo how your relationship are at that point in time. And remember that a smaller bridal party is usually easier to coordinate and manage than a larger one.

Post # 4
1914 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2014 - Dallas, TX

I would strongly recommend waiting to choose your bridesmaids. A LOT can change in 17 months. I’m getting married in September of this year and didn’t ask mine until February. I’m glad I waited because two of my bridesmaids, who I’m extremely close with now, I probably wouldn’t have asked back in June when I first got engaged.

Post # 5
5866 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: April 2013

View original reply
kellybee33:  Here are a few options to consider

1) There is not need to choose a bridal party more than 1 year out.  Give yourself to Sept to figure it out and don’t ask anyone until then (make sure Fiance does the same)

2) I would strongly consider just cutting it off at the 3 people per side. That is a PLENTY big wedding party anyway. 

3) Maybe reconsider uneven numbers.  I have NO IDEA why people care about even numbers, but in your case there is a compelling reason that even numbers works: if your Fiance has 5 guys and you only have 3, the two university friends are going to really raise and eyebrow and wonder why they are not BMs.

I would be really unlikely to invite them to be BMs at this stage as you are probably correct that you’ll drift apart after they graduate.  And no one needs a known drama queen as a Bridesmaid or Best Man.  Give it at least until the end of the summer and see how you feel then.

Post # 6
354 posts
Helper bee

View original reply
kellybee33:  if you know there will be drama, then don’t do it. It will just get worse and you will regret it, possibly damaging the friendship too.

The topic ‘Choosing Bridesmaids’ is closed to new replies.

Find Amazing Vendors