(Closed) Chore solutions

posted 8 years ago in Married Life
Post # 32
4753 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

2 solutions you did not think of:

1) he grows up, like goes from momma’s boy to a grown man.

2) continues to act like a child, in which case move back in with his mom, so she’ll clean for him.

Post # 34
490 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: March 2015

View original reply
@kay01:  I would just hire professionals and then tell him that if he wants to save money, he has to help you. He doesn’t help, he has to pay. End of story.

Post # 35
580 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

I’d hand that boy a mop and tell him to get with the program. Just saying. 

Post # 36
10009 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2012

Maybe you could try scheduling a time for chores. For example, every Monday, Wednesday and Friday you will both clean for 30 minutes after work (doesn’t sound like much, but it’s 3 hours between the two of you, right?). Write up a list of chores to be worked on each day. Maybe he wouldn’t find it so annoying if there was a time limit on it?

Post # 37
2873 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

why not have someone come in to do the deep cleaning once or twice a month – scrubbing shower/bath etc. and then the ‘maintenance’ cleaning is a lot less. on top of this – divide up the chores. don’t give him the option of not doing anything

this would work very well in combination with 

View original reply
@Westwood:  ‘s plan of 30 mins 3 times a week

if he is unhappy with the expenditure…then he needs to do  more around the house

Post # 38
679 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2015


Cleaning is a part of being a healthy adult. It is unsanitary and disgusting to live like a pig just because someone doesn’t enjoy it. I once dated two men who did not clean and it made me very angry. They are still unhappily single in their forties and I’m sure that the condition of their homes are part of the reason.

I keep our place mostly free of cat hair by using a Swiffer, a vacuum, a lint roller and a broom. I use the lint roller on our comforters several times and the sticky side picks up the hair very well. The Swiffer is used on the hardwood and vinyl floors, as well as our vacuum for our rugs.

This is a basic compatibility issue. I am so glad that I lived with my husband before we were married. We learned so much and made compromises about maintaining our living space. I couldn’t have married a man who was not clean. My husband is the neatest man I have ever known.

Since your husband does not like to clean, it will be hard to get him to do his share. Every decision you make will have drawbacks, so choose the option which is less painful for both of you. I do the laundry, cooking and cleaning while my husband does the grocery shopping, dishes and cat box.

Post # 39
232 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

Are you stressed by doing all the cleaning? Or is it just that he is complaining about watching you clean? I think your best option is to hire someone to do the heavy cleaning.


Post # 40
3562 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

OP, my Fiance is similar in the fact that a messy house does not bother him.  I end up doing most of the heavy cleaning (toilets/bathtubs/mopping/dusting).  FI will not take it upon himself to clean things that need to be cleaned, so I am constantly saying, “Hey, can you take out the trash?” or “Switch that laundry out for me please!”  

I find that if I just randomly ask him to do things, he’ll do them, but if I never mentioned anything to him, he won’t do them on his own. 

Once a month I manage to get him to help with cleaning on a weekend morning.  I split the rooms up between us (we have a small 2 BR apartment), and give him a running list of things to be done because his idea of clean and mine are different. 

Fiance would much rather help me clean and do what I ask, than to sit around watching me clean knowing he’ll have to deal with attitude from me about it. 

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