(Closed) Christian perspective on sleeping in the same bed?

posted 6 years ago in Christian
Post # 16
Member
123 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: April 2016

Before my fiance left to live with his brother and I would sleep with him all the time. Occasionally having sex as well. But his brother is also Christian and does not permit me staying at his house at least not sleeping on the same bed as him. It has been extremely hard putting the sex apart because i so miss the cuddling and that feeling of having someone next to me. I think that you should do what works well for you.

Post # 17
Member
210 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2016

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Kacey23:  Hey Kacey,

Yes, I would say doing this regularly (or every night) would be difficult if you were waiting until marriage to have sex. My fiance and I are waiting. We live in different states, and have on occasion shared a bed when we were visiting just to avoid paying for a second hotel room – which we have also done a number of time – it sucks,lol. I would say the more we engage in this behavior the more difficult waiting has become. I am thrilled that we only have one more visit before we will be married and can have sex! yay!

Post # 18
Member
949 posts
Busy bee

My husband and I had sex before we were married, but even before we starting having sex, we would occasionally sleep in one another’s bed (we lived in the same dorm/hall of residence for our first year of university) and cuddle. Even these days, there are times when I much prefer just cuddling.

Post # 19
Member
1 posts
Wannabee

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anothermrskim :  its actually wrong and is a sin. Its in the Bible. God made sex for marriage.

Post # 20
Member
156 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: City, State

I am a “liberal” Christian by many relative standards, but I did grow up incredibly conservative, so I would not do really anything sexual all through college and beyond, but I was able to share beds with my boyfriends and honestly have no trouble with it, exercised plenty of self control, etc. Human beings have instincts of survival and protection, and sleeping next to someone else is comforting. I can see why the church wouldn’t exactly encourage it because it can be a very tempting situation if people are otherwise trying to abstain from sexual activity, but it’s all up to the individual how you can handle it and what you feel comfortable with, etc. I don’t believe there is one huge black and white idea around it.

Post # 22
Member
5 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: October 2017

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Kacey23 :  not necessarily. I’m a non denominational Christian and have been with my FH for 10 years since HS. We already had sex by 18/19 and stayed over each other’s houses at 25/26. We stopped. Sleeping in the same bed, as innocent as we may think it is, is inviting the image of marriage without being married. So, he no longer stays over and vice versa. The first night back to sleeping with each other will be 10/15/17. Temptation is real and having your FH or FW next to you is inviting it in. 

Post # 23
Member
5 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: October 2017

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notanaxemurderer :  you’re in the Christian section. Do you really think we aren’t going to use Biblical information?

Post # 24
Member
1 posts
Wannabee

 Any advice would be appreciated.

 

Well this is a bit of a unique situation I met my girlfriend in the same house I lived in, let me explain we were students and moved into a commune we didnt know each other before hand but became best friends and close from Day 1 then two weeks later we were dating. It worked really well being able to build a strong relationship, not having to make time to see each other cooking dinner together so with regards to “moving in together” we had already moved in together before we met each other. We fell into sexual sin but then we discussed it with each other and knew that if we wanted to have a Christian relationship the sex had to stop, because we made this decision together and both knew its wrong we haven’t had the desire to do it again because we conciously know we would be sinning.

However we still want to sleep in the same bed, discuss our day what our plans are for tomorrow and enjoy the cuddling and keeping our relationship strong and being close. No fooling around either we made that clear to each other. If we could we will get married tomorrow we know we are meant for each other and we agreed to wait till we are married till we do it again. What should we do, any advice would be appreciated

Post # 25
Member
1836 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: December 2017

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Nick Bacon :  Honestly I would avisé against sleeping the same bed because I think, especially with your history, the temptation would be too great. You can still cuddle and discuss your days and plans without sleeping in the same bed.

Di you have a plan for when you’ll get married? 

Post # 26
Member
182 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

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sensoda :  I agree it is definately not a good idea.

Post # 27
Member
495 posts
Helper bee

Chrisitians wouldn’t be sleeping in the same bed until they were married.

Post # 28
Member
182 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

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merrymargaret :  agreed completely 

Post # 29
Member
1027 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

we waited, that would be wayyy too tempting!! I think there is something special about it too. It was nice that it was new to us on honeymoon.

Post # 30
Member
182 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

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reptilelvr :  agree well said 

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