Post # 1
My FH wants to go to church the morning following our wedding. I don’t want to – at least not to a church of people we know. I’m trying to explain that I don’t want to go because I know that I’m going to be emotionally processing still and it would be hard for me to be around a lot of people that are going to come talk to us and things. He thinks I’m assuming that the emotions will be bad. I’m not. However, my wedding night will be our first time for intimacy, and knowing my emotional self, I’m going to need to process! He keeps asking what’s the difference between one day and a week. I just don’t know how to explain it to help him understand.
Any ideas? Or anyone been there?
Post # 3
I know my FH and I won’t be at church the morning after and we are both very passionate about attending church quite regularly. I understand where you are coming from. I think that the morning after a night of “wedded bliss”, I wouldn’t want to try to get my mind right and get to church. It is a lot to process, and being around a bunch of people would be awkward.
Post # 4
Since people would know (or at least expect) that last night would have been your first time, I am having trouble imagining anything more embarassing. Besides your first morning wakeup together should be treasured and leaisurely, not having to rush off to church.
We did attend church in the country town we were honeymooning in, one week after our wedding.
Post # 5
Umm, no…..My DH and I are regular attenders with our own ministries, but my pastor would have told us to go home if we showed up to church the day after the wedding. Enjoy your honeymoon! If he really feels bad about it, have a little Bible study time together in the morning.
PS.- We also waited till our wedding night to have sex, and I am positive he will not want to leave your side (or the bed) the morning after.
Post # 6
@missbee15: Tell your fiance that you’re looking forward to your wedding night, but that women have a lot of emotions connected to sex that men don’t. Explain that you’re going to be too full of new emotions that you haven’t had time to process yet to less than 12 hours later sit with people giving you knowing looks. Explain that you need a few days to embrace these new feelings before facing those sorts of looks.
I’m sexually experienced, but I remember the emotions of my first time well enough to say that I was an emotional wreck. It was a positive experience and they were good emotions, but I was pretty shakey and not ready to face a church full of people I knew right after.
Post # 7
My FI said the morning after his first wedding night (they were both virgins and VERY religious) they attended church and people kept talking to him about the wedding night and giving him high fives or making commentary about them “losing it” and that it was incredibly awkward.
I definitely wouldn’t go the morning after.
Post # 8
I think it is totally fine to choose not to attend church the next day. I think I personally would attend church because how cool is it to go your first time as a married couple and it throws off me week so bad to miss. However there is NO way I would attend our church! Talk about awkward! Umm can’t you find a church somewhere out of town to attend? You know go in just before service sit in the back make a quick exit. It will be a lot of emotions to process and you don’t need an audience for that hence why people go on honeymoons 😀
Post # 9
- Wedding: August 2013 - Rocky Mountains USA
Vegging in bed together the morning after will be one of the best parts of your first intimate night together! Definitely just lay down the law that you are NOT getting up to go to church.
Post # 10
The morning after your wedding is an intimate, special time that belongs only to you and your husband. You will never get your first night as a married couple back. It only happens once. If you rush it in any way it will only cheapen the experience for you.
If I were in your situation I would suggest to your fiancé that you stay home and pray together the morning after your wedding day. Speak to your Minister and ask for his or her recommendations on passages from the Bible and prayers that might be especially meaningful for a newly married couple. Take the time to reflect and enjoy one another’s company!
Post # 11
Maybe you could explain to him that the religious ceremony the day before could subsititute for getting up and going to church in the morning. To be honest, even 12 or so hours later, it is pretty hard to wipe the silly “Yeah, we just did it” smile of your face and be reverant for church.
I understand that your husband to be wants to start the marriage off with God, and I would tell him that you respect that, but that you would prefer having an intimate Bible study with him that morning.
Have ya’ll considered possibly going to an evening church service?
Post # 12
Yep, if there’s an evening worship service, that could be an answer.
Otherwise, it mght be a good time to start a weekly or daily couples devotional.
Post # 13
We will definitely be attending Mass the day after our wedding. We believe that we can give up an hour to reflect on the promises we made the day before and thank God for our relationship. That being said, we definitely won’t be attending the 845 am Mass that we usually do! haha. We will be attending an afternoon Mass at a different parish (his whole family attends our usual parish and we don’t want the honeymoon interrupted once we start it!) before our 6pm flight!
Post # 14
If you husband-to-be really wants to attend church the next day, then go! BUT to another church so nobody stares at you guys… and later like noon ish…
Post # 15
@missbee15: We did not go to church the morning after our wedding. We did go to gaming… long story… but if anyone even mentioned the wedding night, I squelched them with sharp look.
You guys could watch a service online? I would definitely advise that!!
Post # 16
Online could work, ask him if there’s any room for compromise….lol, you’re gonna be married, compromise is suggested.