(Closed) Church told my family not to attend wedding :(

posted 10 years ago in Emotional
Post # 17
3219 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2010

I am so sorry you are dealing with this. It is just so wrong! I cant believe they would even ask your parents to pick between their childs wedding & the church!

Post # 18
1560 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

wow. just wow. I really don’t mean to be rude here or mean in any way – but it’s instances like this that make me almost want to be against religions. I’m not – at all – and am proud to be a part of my own church (even though, granted I don’t go but my family still does) – but it is just so incredibly sad to hear of instances like this when religions tell you you can’t do something because they don’t like it. My husband is not religious for this very reason.

Regardless. I do hope you find a solution for you and your family to celebrate your (what should be) most wonderful occasion in your life. Good luck!! And I hope you have a wonderful wedding.

Post # 19
140 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: January 2012

That’s horrible! I can’t even imagine the emotions you must be feeling. I am so sorry you have to deal with this, this was just an eye opener I never before thought some churches are still acting like this! It’s just so worng and so unjust.

Post # 20
5496 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: April 2010

I’m so sorry you have to deal with all this and so soon before your wedding. I think it’s wonderful that your dad is able to come now, but that is sad he will lose his position. But, he’s going to be there for you on your big day!!!!! That’s wonderful!!!! 

Post # 21
2004 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 2008

This is so heartbreaking. I don’t have any advice but to keep on putting one foot in front of the other. My thoughts are with you.

Post # 22
335 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

As soon as I finished reading your post, I knew exactly what religion you were talking about because I have heard of this happening before, not only because of a wedding but under other circumstances as well…..one being someone very close to me was shunned by her entire family….I mean they did not speak 1 word to her in months because she questioned them on why having a blood transfusion was so wrong especially if it was a matter of life and death.  (They would rather die than to get a blood transfusion)  She now no longer questions anything in fear that she will be ousted indefinitely.  So she now sits in silence and feels alone since she truly does not share their religious beliefs.  Very sad really…. 

I am really happy to hear though that your Father will be attending.  This is truly a blessing.   My Father will not be at my wedding because he died a couple months after I met my Fiance….but I know he will be there in spirit =) 

I really wish you the best and I hope that some of your other family members decide to come to this very special and blessed day.

Post # 23
2820 posts
Sugar bee

What a horrible thing.  I’m so glad your parents are going to support you.  Please don’t feel guilty.  Lots of people interpret religion in lots of different ways – and I’m glad your parents aren’t letting some guy on a power trip make them miss their daughters wedding.  My feeling is that any religion that tries to isolate their members or prevent them from interacting in society has many things to hide itself. 

Post # 24
581 posts
Busy bee


I’m so gld your parents will be there to celebrate your marriage. 

troubled My feeling is that any religion that tries to isolate their members or prevent them from interacting in society has many things to hide itself.    DITTO

Best wishes as you and your Fiance get ready for your wedding.

Post # 25
3761 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

Best wishes for you and your husband. 

Post # 26
1254 posts
Bumble bee

Wow. Wow. Wow. Wow. I was speechless after reading your post. I just figured in this day and age…wow.

I am so very sorry that you are going through this and I am glad that your Dad has decided to come. I hope your other family members come around in time for your special day.

Being in this situation sucks but thank you America for freedom. Without it you, your Fiance, and your family couldn’t choose your own beliefs, religion, creed. I am sending you positive thoughts all around.

Post # 27
435 posts
Helper bee

I’m so sorry.  YOur parents sound great though. I hope it all works out.

Post # 28
2271 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2009

That is absolutely horrible. I can not imagine a church or religion that would be so closed-minded that they would forbid some one attending a wedding. A wedding is to celebrate a union, not a rally to convert people to another religion. My in-laws are DEVOUT Catholics – like they go to mass almost every day. Yet I did not hear a peep about me not being Catholic or having a non-Catholic wedding.

While I am a deeply spiritual person, I do not follow just one religion because I never understood how in one church something can be ok and in another the same thing is a sin.

Anyway, I would be very proud of those in your family who are sticking by you.

Post # 30
2695 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2010

I just can’t believe this and I’m sorry for you and your family to have to make such a hard decision.  I too agree with others that maybe you can have a family dinner to celebrate.  You don’t even have to call it to celebrate for the wedding.  My Dad and Step-mom had a ceremony with just us kids.  Then a year later had a Holiday Party and served fancy food/drinks at their home.  They had the week of their one year aniv.  We knew that it was their wedding party but everyone else took it as a housewarming/holiday party.

Hang in there

Post # 31
382 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

Sorry to hear about this. Jehovah’s Witness are notoriously strict- you’re either with them or against them. I wouldn’t be surprised if your dad was shunned for this. I agree with edina, there are online communities and IRL communities for people that have been shunned that your dad should check out if he has a hard time with this. I’m so glad your parents chose you, and as melissabegins said, this could be the starting point of a whole new way of life for your parents- a wake up call, if you will. Good luck with everything, I’m sure your wedding will be great now that your mother and father are there! It must suck that your extended family won’t be there but really, it sounds like they are not very supportive anyway.

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