- dynamic_duo
- 9 years ago
yikes, i wouldn’t use this as a reason to get him circumcised. rather, i would teach my son that anyone who doesn’t accept him and his body the way he is, is not worth his time.
yikes, i wouldn’t use this as a reason to get him circumcised. rather, i would teach my son that anyone who doesn’t accept him and his body the way he is, is not worth his time.
My Dearest is uncircumcised (his mother was quite progressive for her time, I guess), and 3 of his 4 sons are not (the hospital did the circ on the first one without getting consent). We’re Southern (West Virginia and Tennessee), and I know of a few men my age who are not (in fairness, they were born in Europe). Should we have children, sons are not getting circed–I hate doing it to babies, and want my future sons to have the choice. But, in the “boys within the South” question, I have 9 nephews, all of whom are circed..my kids will be the odd ones among their cousins. Hopefully we’re raising everyone right to be hygenic …and accepting of others.
My thoughts are… take a look at the pros and cons and make a consious educated decision between you and your husband that you guys feel confortable with ๐ Either decision you make is going to be the right one for your family.
FWIW – We are in (south western) VA and did circumcise. My bro is in NC and did NOT circumsise. All based on our own personal choices not based on anyone around us ๐ (I know it’s not DEEP south – but it IS the south ๐ :))
@candicemcc: I just wanted to add, is your DH circumcised? Maybe the easiest solution is to just do whatever your DH has so “all the peni in the house look the same.” Also, if your DH isn’t circumcised he can show him the ropes for how to maintain cleanliness etc. and support him in potential matters of his future GFs feeling uncomfortable. If your DH IS circumcised, I think it would be difficult to relate to the issues of an uncircumcised son who is perhaps struggling with “being different.”
PPs may suggest to teach him that anyone who cannot accept him the way he is is not worth his time (which is a noble mindset), but that is NOT an easy lesson to teach and if he is on the verge of loosing someone he really cares about over this – those words are going to be a very small consolation if any.
That being said, yes, surgery is a huge decision and this is why we’re not being lemmings. Hubby is circumcised and doesn’t want to circ our son. I’ve already told him he’ll have to have an answer prepared when our son asks why they don’t look the same.
There is NO WAY I would ever cut off a part of my sons penis so girls will like it more or so he’ll look like his dad. I’m sorry, I just can’t see it any other way. There is NO scientific evidence to support it, its all social.
If we have a boy we plan to circumsize. Fiance is circumsized and so are the other men in both our families. So he wants the same for his sons and I am ok with that. To be honest, I’d rather it because I would be so scared that I wasn’t cleaning the foreskin good enough.
I’ve never been with an uncircumsized man but I have two friends who have. One friend’s husband agreed to get circumsized as an adult because his wife kept getting bacterial infections. He is clean so that was not the issue, but she has very sensitive skin down there. Since the circum there have been no problems. My other friend said it ws weird at first but she never really had any issues with him being uncircumsized.
*The only reason uncircumsized men have a higher incdence of STD’s and penile cancer is because it is more difficult to keep themselves clean.
I grew up in Alabama and boys that weren’t circumcised definitely got teased about it. I can still remember the names of the boys that weren’t because people talked about it! I dated a guy that wasn’t and it did creep me out although I don’t remember thinking it was “unclean” or smelled bad. For me (I’m having a boy) I will do it. I realize it is for social reasons mostly. For me that is an acceptable reason, although I realize for some posters that is not a legitimate reason to do it. I just think if you can save your child a stigma and I don’t think of it as particularly harmful, then why not do it? Of course, your boy will be 30 years younger than I am so being uncircumcised will likely be more common in the region by then.
lucyv2003: I, nor any of my social health professors, have ever read anything that says that. I’d be interested to see where that came from (this can be interpreted as snarky–I swear I’m actually curious to learn more). I’ll poke around the internet too, just if you know where the study is I’d love to bring it to class.
When my son was born, I left it up to his dad (my ex-husband). He’s circumcised, and wanted his son to be the same. Now TTC with new soon-to-be-DH, and we’ve had the same conversation with the same answer. We’re extremely liberal Southerners, but there’s just something about a daddy wanting his potential son to look like him. Obviously that’s not the rule, but that’s what I’ve found with both of my guys.
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