Post # 1
in my family all the women have to have a hysterectomy before the age of 35, due to health problems and cancer. Everytime i think about this it makes my heart beat so fast!! My fiance and I both want a large family, about 4-5 kids and the more we get into ttc, the more worried i get. We had decided to start trying even if i have to waddle down the aisle! Due to me having the depo shot a while back i still havent even had a regular cylce, so it could take a year! Im tired of being told i have all this time to have kids…no i dont! my ovaries will be chopped off in maybe 10-15 yrs!! I may have to get a hysterectomy before 35 yo! is anyone is the same boat or been in it? How are/did u cope? i pretty much need some support and see if im not the only one getting nervous after each negative preg test
Post # 3
I’m not in your position at all, and have no idea what you’re going through. But if you’re set on having a big family, have you considered adoption? You could feasibly get 2-3 out on your own, and also adopt later on so there isn’t as much pressure. Just a thought…
Post # 4
I have considered it but I honestly would rather have my own. later down the road if it comes to the it that I can’t have but a couple of children then maybe I would? I don’t really know…i don’t want to offend anyone with my answer, I just have some personal things with adoption that has set me a bit iffy growing up
Post # 5
Don’t let fear rush you into a decision. Here’s my story:
I almost had a hysterectomy @ the age of 31 but due to the diligence of my OB/Gyn, it was averted. Everyone told me to do the single Mom thing but I didn’t want to raise my child w/out their father. 10yrs later, my Fiance and I will be trying in the next month. The women on both sides of the family have had hysterectomies by 40 but I’m 41 and no major problems. Before you rush to have children, please discuss w/ your doctor. Science and technology has advanced dramatically so what once required hysterectomy now doctors have other options. And always get a 2nd opinion.
My bestie discovered after a miscarriage, all the fertility issues plaguing the women in her family. Armed w/ this info, a great doctor and 7 months of bed rest, she was able to deliver a healthly baby boy.
You may have more time than you expect so go visit your doctor.
Post # 6
I had to have a hysterectomy in my early 20’s, so I can totally understand what you’re going through and the fear you must have. However, having the hysterectomy saved my life, and I don’t regret it for a moment.
I have always wanted to adopt, even as a child, but I can understand that it’s not for everyone.
Sometimes, when I see pregnant women or hear women’s birth stories it makes me wonder about what I’m missing out on, but I know that having the hysterectomy was the right decision for me.
Post # 7
You have 10-15 years, you can have 4-5 children, relax (easier said then done, I know)! My friend is in a similar situation but is not involved with anyone so she’s even more panicked. Your path is not a typical one but you’re getting married and you’re planning ahead to have children , you’ll be okay.
Post # 8
I get it, I totally do. However, I think you should focus on being financially and emotionally ready before you jump into having children just b/c the clock is counting down. Easier said than done, my uterus has a time limit due to health reasons and I don’t ovulate regularly in addition to that. That’s why my Fiance and I are putting our ducks in a row before we get married so as soon as we’re married (which should be next year) we can TTC. Good luck!
EDIT: Btw, I’m 22, will be 23/24 when we’re married and I would love to have a large family if that is our calling, but I also want to adopt/foster. I’d love though to experience atleast one biological child so I get where you’re coming from and fostering/adopting has it’s own set of emotional burdens. Lastly, there are many women who get pregnant right after they give birth depending on the way you give birth (vaginally vs. C-section)–I wouldn’t suggest it but for some child spacing (from delivery to delivery) is 12-18 months instead of 18-36 months as usually suggested by the medical community.
Post # 9
I agree with Beekiss and Squeak35, don’t scramble because of fear. Are you basing your predictions off just family history? Remember, that counts for a lot in terms of your own reproductive health, but NOT everything. So many things come into play when it comes to your body, you need to be well-informed about YOU.
It might make you feel way better to visit an Ob/Gyn and let him/her know about your concerns, and have a thorough checkup. That way, if there are concerns, you would have solid medical advice guiding your decisions and the TTC process.
Post # 10
10-15 years is plenty of time to have kids, (even for a big famiyl!) dont stress to mmuch! (easier said then done right?!?) i wouuldnt rush your timeline bc of family history, remember your past family members didnt have the technolgoy that is availbable today. plus you dont even know if you have any health problems with ttc, you should go to the doctor and explain your family history an di am sure they can run some tests to ease your mind given your family histroy. honestly, i wouldnt rush into having kids if your doing it bc you feel like time is running out. i would make sure i had everything in line (emotionally, finacially).
Post # 11
thank you all so much for your input…made me a lot more sound. I’m finacially and emotionally ready for children, I’ve known about family history for years, but I’m just worried that if I wait too long…bam no ovaries! Lol I’m lucky that twins run in fi family. I have had a lot of similar health issues as my mom and all other women in family… Which is scary. The last thing I want to battle is cancer and no children.