(Closed) Close to tears… so lost… please help ladies!

posted 8 years ago in Reception
Post # 17
Member
413 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

How does your Fiance feel about it?

Post # 19
Member
413 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

I guess it really depends how he feels if he is faced with the decision of not having her there. List out the options to help you and him make a decision. Good luck girlie!

Post # 20
Member
3216 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: February 2012

I wonder if they’re just making excuses because they don’t want to go?  It’s their son, they should be over the moon and shelling out the $100 for the two of them to eat with you!  I bet they’re hoping you force their hand so they can say “well, we told you we couldn’t make it if you had it there…” so they don’t have to show up. 

Post # 21
Member
3107 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2018

I’ll never understand some parents…

That said, you can’t dictate how they spend their money. They have this trip planned & want to get the most out of it. If you want it a certain way, you need to come up with a couple hundred bucks and cover it. Personally I would find it awkward to have people paying their own way. You are inviting them to celebrate so you should do what you can afford even if you are having a more traditional event next year. This is your wedding!

Post # 22
Member
3323 posts
Sugar bee

@poetiksoul1225:  You are inviting them out to celebrate, and thus should host everyone.  If you cannot afford it, then scale back to something you can manage.  Perhaps cake and punch at someone’s home.

It is not polite to judge other people’s finances.  Perhaps they can afford it, but they are not obligated to spend their money on your vision.  Their priority is obviously this holiday, and they are entitled to that.  Your wedding is only of the utmost importance to you. 

Post # 23
Member
5427 posts
Bee Keeper

They have known this since January?  And couldn’t afford to save at least $10 a month which would make it $80 in August? But can afford a  “vacation to Florida, stay at a resort for a week, and jet skee and sky dive”? 

I am literally shaking my head in disgust. Shell out the $100 and spend it for your son’s wedding day which happens only once in a lifetime! And skimp on the vacation dinners or something…

Post # 24
Member
1659 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

Is she planning to pay for like her whole side of TE family? Maybe she thinks she will be spending more – I know that when the whole family goes out, we expect my mom or grandma to pay, so maybe she’s thinking $1k not $100.

Post # 25
Member
5427 posts
Bee Keeper

View original reply
@Ellegee:  never thought of that!

Post # 28
Member
108 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

Don’t feel guilty for doing what you want. This is your only request and they can’t afford it? I’ve dealt/dealing with a similar situation and though this may sound rude, I say invite them and if they can’t come because they “can’t afford it” then that’s their choice. Maybe if your Fiance explained the importance of the dinner to the Mother-In-Law she will try to hear you out. You definately shouldn’t have to pay for them.

Post # 30
Member
3580 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

I guess I am confused as to why you’re inviting people to dinner to celebrate your wedding but you’re asking them to pay?  What am I missing?

Post # 31
Member
413 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

Um, are they in full support of him marrying you? Have you had any problems in the past with FMIL? Maybe she is having a hard time letting go of her son and trying to make your miserable.

The topic ‘Close to tears… so lost… please help ladies!’ is closed to new replies.

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