- 8 years ago
- Wedding: May 2018
Your dinner.. your Day, your rules. Like you said.. she ” suggested” — and you shouldnt take her suggestion in consideration if you feel like its not what YOU want. if they cant afford it, they can always borrow from friends.. which I highly doubt they cant afford a 40 dollar meal..
We’d be pleased if you would join our private intimate wedding ceremony Aug 11 at (enter location) Immediately afterword we will have pictures taken and then have cake and a champagne toast.
Later that evening, the newlyweds and our parents will be having dinner and drinks at ZED451 (insert location). We would love for you to celebrate with us, but we understand if you can’t. I have included links to the restaurant that includes the menu and prices….
after that I’m lost lol
I also am confused as to having a celebration after the wedding which would require people to pay for their own plates. Maybe a better option would be to have a romantic dinner with just your future husband and yourself?
Being surrounded by loved ones on one’s special day is important. This seems like the most important prioirty to me. Perhaps having a small, intimate, and elegant dinner at home would permit for you to host without expectations from your guests.
You should pay for them even though you will have a formal wedding and reception next year. When you invite someone to celebrate your wedding (even though it’s just a courthouse), you still should pay for them. If you can’t pay for them, then make the guest list smaller and pick a very nice restaturant as you want.
You should definitely go where you want to go. But personally for me, if I invited people out to celebrate my weddding, whether we go to Taco Bell or Fancy Schmancy Steakhouse, I’d pay. This is exactly what we’re doing for ours. We are not having a reception, but just a nice sit down dinner at an upscale resturaunt. And we are footing the entire bill because they are there to celebrate with us.
This is still a post wedding event, which makes It a small reception, which makes you and your Fiance hosts. You should therefore host the dinner, and therefore pay, per etiquette. It doesn’t matter if it is a 300 personfive course meal or a simple cake and punch reception. Guests should not pay for their meals or beverages at a wedding.
If it’s a nice enough place, I doubt they will print the price on the menue. So she should have nothing to worry about.
Throw a barbeque or something. It is VERY bizarre for people to pay for a meal you are hosting in honor of your wedding. Comparing this to a regular meal dining out with friends and family is NOT apples to apples. Would you ask your guests to pay for their meals at your rehearsal dinner?
You have given up enough already. Have your upscale dinner, and don’t compromise about it. The inlaws don’t have to spend $50 to come and visit during the meal. They can eat at Chilis beforehand and then just get dessert at the nice place. They can do whatever they need to do to be present for their son. And you and your fi should get the elegant dinner you want–especially since you haven’t seen him in so long. Your wedding day, evening and night should be romantic and lovely in the way the two of you want it to be.
After readng through the comments again, I think the suggestion that you have cake and punch and a toast and some appetizers with everyone is the best plan. Do your parents or a friend have a house that could accomodate everyone for an hour or two? Then you and your hubby start your wedding night with the romantic upscale dinner for two. No Chili’s and no asking anyone to pay.
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