(Closed) Cold feet?

posted 11 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
466 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

Only you know what’s right for you.  Just a couple things I want to offer up: this whole concept of The One is not necessarily true.  There isn’t only one person in the whole world that you can be happy with! 

Also, don’t settle!  This is something my mom told me over and over again and she was so right.  If you don’t feel like your Fiance is the right guy, don’t marry him!  You’re young and you have plenty of time. 

I’m sorry you’re going through this.  Being engaged is an emotional time!  Try to take a step back and listen to your heart.  Good luck.

Post # 5
62 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

This is a tricky thing… 

If I were in your position, I might take some more time to be simply “dating”. Take the pressure of, so to speak. This might be tough, but it could also give you a lot of clarity on the situation. 

I’d also consult a trusted, wise person much older than you on this. They might be able to sympathize or give advice. 

Best of luck! 

Post # 6
1509 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

This is totally normal.  Every girl goes through it!  I think you need to determine if there are actually problems with your Fiance or if you are just freaking out over the forever part.  If its the later, that is totally normal.  If you are concerned because he has a terrible temper, calls you names, or something specific, then it might be time to re-evaluate.

Post # 8
2214 posts
Buzzing bee

If it’s just normal jitters, then that’s normal.  If you really are worried about him not being “the one” or that something may be wrong, then just have a long engagement.  You’re only 21.  The institution of marriage isn’t going anywhere, and there is nothing wrong with taking more time until you are 100% sure.  You just have to do some soul searching to figure out what you really are feeling.

Post # 9
4544 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

It sounds like you need to figure out if you’re ready for marriage and if he’s the one. You say you feel like he’s the one but the forever part is the part that worries you. I’d suggest a long engagement at the least, as well as looking deeply and honestly at your feelings. You are young and this doesn’t mean you’re not ready to get married but you may need more time before you feel ready to make a committment. Only you know what is right for you, so spend some time thinking about it and keep talking about it until you’re sure.

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