Post # 1
Hi Bees 🙂
I just started going to school full-time (was previously a part-time night student working full-time), and I stopped working with the intention of having more time with Fiance and to graduate before the wedding. He works very long hours so hardly saw him or had to study if he was around. I have about 5 hours of class per day and I’m trying not to do schoolwork much on the weekend. Since he knows my days are much shorter (5 hours instead of 11 work/school per day) there is more expectation to manage the house – cook – laundry – errands – family time – etc. My mother and grandfather are ill, and I’d like to spend time with them, and then there’s the whole wedding planning thing…
I feel guilty if I’m not taking care of Fiance or my mom. I just got my reading lists and I’m feeling pretty stressed, its my final year and I’ve never had 5 classes at once!
Post # 3
I’m not in school, but I am a Stay-At-Home Wife (I never say Stay-At-Home Mom because my daughter is in school all day..so I’m not really catering to her until 2:45)
I started making a list the other day of chores I wanted to complete on certain days. I feel like it’s my responsibility more than DH’s to keep the house clean. But I don’t want to do the same things everyday…overkill. Darling Husband says he would work on one room a day. Whatever. I think one big CHORE a day would be fine…windex all the windows and vacuum baseboards, ceiling fans, etc..dishes are everyday, laundry is everyday. cooking takes at least two hours a night.
I like to get it done in the early morning (after I drop of Dirty Delete at school) so I can do last minute stuff in the afternoon (read-nap) or spend some time working on my painting furniture/one day etsy shop stuff.
Post # 4
I think you should discuss and manage his expectations instead of trying to manage your time differently. I’m a full time student, but my Fiance can see for himself that I’m much busier than he is. He cleans and manages the house more than I do because we can both see clearly that physically being at home more does not equate to being less busy. Granted, I do also work part time, but I think my point still stands because there’s a large range of how much can be expected from students. Edit: he also works full time from 8 am to 5:30, so it’s not like he has plenty of time at home either.
Post # 5
@Taeyers I wish it were that easy but he probably works 80-90 hours most weeks… We were joking about needing a nanny for ourselves before I stopped working because things just didn’t get done… Like eating.. Lol. But you’re right about communicating, I can the room for resentment coming from both of us in time
Post # 6
I am in grad school and working part time, and my husband is working full time. We’re remodeling right now, so I do most of the cooking/cleaning, since I am not that helpful with the drywall hanging etc. My goal is to get all of my work, especially school work, done while my husband is at work, so that we can maximize our quality time together when he’s home. I have a to-do list with 3 things that need to get done, and then a flexible number of things that would be nice to get done. Some days I can’t do as much, so I try to make sure to do those three, and then anything else is extra.