(Closed) Common Mistakes People Make at Weddings…

posted 6 years ago in Recaps
Post # 3
Member
115 posts
Blushing bee

 

I agree that it’s helpful to think about ways to improve the “guest experience” at weddings. Here are a few I’ve noticed:

  • Taking too much time for post-ceremony pictures. It can be hard to strike a balance here, but I plan to do a first look and quite a few pre-ceremony pictures to make sure that guests aren’t waiting on the bride and groom for too long. 
  • Complicated escort card/seating arranagements. It might be something very cute, but if it’s hard for guests to understand then it kind of defeats the purpose. 
  • Making guests get seated at tables and wait too long for wedding party/bride and groom to enter. I’m debating between nixing entrances altogether (or just something low-key) and trying to figure out an easy way to do this where people aren’t waiting too long.
  • Try to personally thank each guest/spend time with them. I think if you prioritize pictures/lots of post-ceremony time for the bride and groom, there is inevitably less time with guests. I would like to take some time with my new husband but not so much that the rest of our guests feel left out. 
  • Think of fun things for kids if they are at the wedding. I think parents really appreciate this and this can also make for adorable pictures. πŸ™‚ 
  • Don’t make bridal party sit together without significant others (think I only went to one wedding that was like this and felt kinda lonely as the “date”)

I think those are the main ones. Curious to hear more from others!

Post # 4
Member
4046 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

If you include directions with the invite, make sure they are accurate.

After the wedding, make sure there is enough room in everyone’s car/enough people staying behind in order to pack up the goodies/decorations/gifts.

Post # 5
Member
750 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

I think that the arrangement of tables/stations in your venue is important to the guest experience, and a good venue coordinator should be able to help with getting a lot of this right. I went to a wedding where the bar was tucked back in a corner of the big reception room and whenever a line formed, we were smooshed behind a table where other guests were witting! It was pretty awkward for the people in line and those at the table trying to have conversations. Yet the cake table – which didn’t generate constant traffic all night – was front and center with a lot of space around it.

Post # 6
Member
270 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

@Rachel631:  I totally agree with this. This was the #1 thing I did not want for my wedding

– HUGE centrepieces. They were beautiful and stylish but made it impossible to see across the table and talk to anyone except the guests on either side of you. They were also too tall, which has an effect on conversation as people are mentally trying to see “over” them when they talk to people around the table, if you see what I mean.

Post # 7
Member
245 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: March 2012

I would say having too many speeches to listen to and dances for guests to “watch.” It can get boring for guests. So, limit the speeches to Maid/Matron of Honor, Bridesmaid or Best Man, and short welcome speech and given them a 5 minutes time-limit! 

Post # 8
Member
94 posts
Worker bee

I would say super long ceremonies, I went to one Catholic wedding, they had a full Mass (not out of the ordinary), then like 5 readings, a unity candle ceremony and something else I can’t even remember. The ceremony was around 4 hours long. The thing just never ended. I would say as a guest, that’s too much. I think prioritizing what you want: full mass? skip the readings or the candle, makes the whole ceremony better. For the record even the bride and groom admitted that they were bored during the ceremony.

Post # 9
Member
827 posts
Busy bee

-loud music. The music is usually so loud that the vibrations make me burp lol. Also, I hate having to shout into people’s ears all night.

-bathroom attendants. I really don’t want someone in the bathroom listening to me pee lol.

-not enough seating during cocktail hour. I know cocktail hour is for mingling, but some of us need to sit for medical reasons.

-not ensuring that your bridal party gets a chance to enjoy the cocktail hour. At my brother’s wedding, I was stuck taking pictures with them almost the whole time.

-head tables. Thankfully, I have never been stuck at one.

-small bathrooms/not many stalls.

-outdoor weddings in the hot summer. How is this comfortable for anybody?

-valet parking. My family hates trusting our cars with random dudes.

Post # 10
Member
5075 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2012

a long wait for dinner.  I hate that.

Post # 11
Member
2281 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

* confusing directions

* too much time in post-wedding pictures and nothing for the guests to do (no food for them either) while they wait. I waited 2 hours once. It was awful.

* centerpieces that make it hard to see across the table

* music too loud

* long speeches (No one cares anymore after the first 30 seconds. Write it in a note and give it to the bride and groom privately).

Post # 12
Member
1064 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

Thank you so much!!I am learning what NOT to do!! πŸ™‚

Post # 13
Member
411 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

I also think this is a helpful thread!

The thing that comes to mind for me is when you’re having a friend or relative officiate who got ordained online and has never performed a wedding before, make sure their written speech includes EVERYTHING you want them to say! At one wedding, the couple had wanted the officiant to remind the guests not to take flash pictures during the ceremony, but the officiant didn’t have it written down and in his nervousness, forgot to say it. The whole ceremony was flash-flash-flash. And at my sister’s wedding that I officiated, I didn’t have “you may be seated” written in my speech … so I just started talking, not noticing that all the guests were still standing from the bride’s entrance. Oops.

Officiants without experience get nervous!!!!!! Leave nothing to chance!

Post # 14
Member
1043 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

@angelapicklebottom:  FOUR HOURS!?!?  For crying out loud…!

Things that have made weddings unpleasant for me:

  • Outdoor ceremony in a public park where it was 107 degrees.  And the bride was 47 minutes late.  (Heck yeah I was counting…)

 

  • Not enough food (I have no problem if your second cousin’s wife’s SIL wants to cater all the food herself, but bring enough so that we can eat after your two hour ceremony and 90 minute picture session).

 

  • HUGE lines for drinks/bar.  If you have 325 guests, you probably need more than one bartender for cocktail hour.  Just a guess.

 

  • Only putting “real china” or “sterling silver” or “crystal” items on your registry so that the cheapest thing I can buy is a $375 fork. 

I feel kinda guilty for even complaining about these things, but it’s kinda fun to read them from others.  HAAAA  πŸ˜‰

Post # 15
Member
3375 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

outdoor weddings. I hate itching, sweating or freezing. I’ve also been to a couple where it rains outside the tent and my hair poofs up and I look horrible.

head tables. It’s kind of weird for the bridal party to sit up there and even weirder for their SO’s to sit by themselves.

 

Post # 16
Member
501 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

The last wedding I went to had a mariachi band that played for someting like 2 hours. 45 minutes for something like that would be enough.

It’s really boring when the couple has soooo many things to announce and do. Example:

We don’t need to sit and watch the slideshow for 30 minutes. It’s boring. I went to a wedding where we literally had to sit and watch it with nothing to do. It was all a slideshow of the bride too. Nothing about the groom. Sorry but it’s boring.

30 minute dollar dance, boring!

Newleywed type of games that last for 20 minutes each, Boring! Not sure if y’all know what I am talking about, I have only seen it once but it was kinda lame.

The best weddings I have been to are the ones where you get there, get your cocktails, have your snacks, eat dinner, drink and dance to good dance music. Keep it simple and it’s sure to be a good time.

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