Post # 1
I started the wedding planning without any ideas about how much weddings cost and after I have decided on the most important things for my fiance and I, thinking with all the research I’ve done we can make it work. And now I’m coming to the realization that we probably can’t even afford that.
The situation: My FH was married before and got no say in the proceedings, so when I suggested Vegas he was less than excited. He wanted a big party celebrating us and our personalites. He suggested a masquerade ball reception, and Halloween being our favorite holiday we’ve both been excited to dress up a bit for the party. We are planning the end of May, so lots of flowers are in bloom, but it’s not quite wedding prime time. And we choose a Monday.
I have done everything I can think of to cut costs, but now thinking we can’t even get the important stuff for less than 13000, and My mother and husband refusing to help, not because they don’t have the money but just because they don’t want to anymore, Is really bringing me down. I don’t know what any of you could do to help but I just wanted some people to talk to, maybe has some ideas out there that could salvage our day.
Video/Photo: 6500 very expensive but also important as Grooms father is too sick to leave the house and mother is his care giver so they won’t be able to attend.
The 4: His son and best man, my Grandmother and MoH can not afford to pay travel expenses, and they are the most important guests.
The food: 1500 really not bad, because there is not a venue fee just this min. food order. We’ve cut the guest list to 28 so that we don’t go over the min.
Anyone out there with advice, encouragement, or anything, I would love to know.
Post # 3
This is probably not what you want to hear…you can’t expect your parents to help pay for your wedding. You’re an adult- if you didn’t have that conversation with them in the beginning, you need to assume you and Fiance are footing the bill.
I think you and Fiance need to sit down and discuss what you can afford. Then, with that budget in mind, readjust your plans. $1500 for food for 28 people is okay but I think you could look around more. I also think travel expenses for 4 people is a ton of money. Your wedding is almost a year away- can they really not save anything by May? $6500 is also on the high-end for photography. I see those prices in DC and NYC, not necessarily Oregon.
I think with a new budget plan you can definitely plan a masquerade-style wedding for much less than 13K in 10 months. Good luck!
Post # 4
i would say cutting cost with the video and photog. have you looked around at other prices. we were first quoted wicked high prices, checked around a bit, now we are getting videography, photography, dj, and photo booth for 4300. I would say def check prices on that stuff.
Im soo sorry your going through this though, it sucks, trust me i know. 🙁
Post # 5
$1500 for 28 doesn’t sound too crazy to me, especially if that means you don’t have to pay an additional vanue fee – that’s a little bit more than $50/pp. Would it be possible to find a friend with a big backyard or a state park where you could reserve a space? Then you could probably spend less money on the food – I bet you could find a more casual caterer to do like, barbecue or something along those lines for less money.
I’m a little confused about the travel expenses though – are there people from your hometown who you are paying to fly to Vegas? Or is this a hometown wedding and you have to pay them to get to you? If it’s the first, maybe doing a hometown wedding to avoid paying their travel costs would work better.
I know the photography/videography is really important, but is there any other photographer/videographer that might work for less? That’s half of your budget right there! Keep an eye out for Groupons, Wedding Channel deals and so on.
Have you thought about buying a pre-owned or consignment wedding dress? Doing the flowers yourself with mail-order or silk flowers or having non-floral centerpieces? Those things can definitely save some money!
Wishing you lots of luck!
Post # 6
The price you’re quoting for video/photo is almost the cost of my entire wedding. You can definitely find it cheaper than that.
Post # 7
You can definitely cut the photo costs. You can still get fantastic photos for much cheaper than that.
Post # 8
I get that photography and videography are very important, and I paid over $6500 for my photography/videography, however that included an engagement session, 10 hours of photographer with a second shooter and a videographer. Since your wedding is only 28 people you do not need a second shooter, and probably no where near 10 hours of photography/videography. Given your budget and the size of the wedding, as well as the fact that the wedding is on a Monday, I think you should be paying much much less. Negotiate with photographers/videographers for fewer hours, and cut out the extras like engagement sessions, prints and albums (you can always purchase these later). I think you should reduce your photography and videography budget to more like $3,500.
Also, yeah, I would hope your family members could save up for airfare given a year’s notice…. Are there relatives in the area that they could stay with so that there is not a hotel cost on top of that?
Post # 9
How much money do you have to spend?
Post # 10
@BooRadley: I did have that convo with my mother, many times. That is why it states she doesn’t want to help anymore.
The cost for photo is so high because it includes videography. And it’s normal for Portland area based on the 30plus photographers I’ve spoken to
Post # 11
I live in a really expensive city and my videographer was half that. I think you need to videographer shop some more!
Post # 12
http://www.thepros.com – check the price in your area if they are close.
Post # 13
@Lt.Columbo: Well this is another thing that’s recently changed. We had planned on using our bonuses throughout the year which would be 10000, Plus the addition of my mother, which was supposed to be at least 5000. But some unexpected expences popped and my mother retracting the help she promised taking the budget down to about 6000.
Post # 14
@KatieBklyn: Sorry, I seemed to have explained this badly. We aren’t going to Vegas because FH does not want to. We are planning a wedding where we live. We are new here because we moved for work. We don’t have any close friends here.
I am making all the flowers, and masks myself , very inexpensively. The Dress I’m looking at is $399.
Post # 15
To the Photo/Video prices, I shopped around quite a bit. My fiance is an amatuer photographer, so it may be that our standards are just too high. Out of the photographers we’ve spoken to there are some a little bit cheaper but they jack up the cost in other ways, like there base just covering time 3-6 hours then charging by the picture, not printed, just jpegs. As for Video these guys are the best deal in town for quality work. This is a 2 guy team that does photo/video, and they have the same sense of humor we do, and they are givin us all the footage. I am going to talk to them about less time though to see what that gets us.
Post # 16
Do your Future In-Laws live in your area? If so, have you considered having a very intimate ceremony at their house, and then a larger reception elsewhere? This should allow you to dramatically cut your photography/videography costs (I wouldn’t think a videographer would be necessary) and put most of that money toward your other expenses instead.
Just a thought. I really hope you find a solution that works for everyone!