Post # 1
Hi everyone, my husband and I started actively trying to conceive in August 2016. I really wanted to have a baby in May 2016 (to avoid 3rd trimester in summer, have DH out of school for the first couple of months, plus it would have worked out perfectly in our finances), so I did everything to prepare. I got off birth control in February 2016 to get all the hormones out of my system and allow my body to regulate, which it did immediately. I started temping and charting in August, along with using OPKs. My body is like clockwork. 26-28 day cycles. Usually ovulate on CD14, but I’ve ovulated as late as CD16. Consistent 12-13 day luteal phase.
My doctor told me the average time to conceive is around 6 months. But that includes people who just stop preventing. I have now starting my seventh cycle of actively trying and timing our intercourse perfectly (There was one cycle that we only hit O-1 but thats a good day to get). I’ve started the ball rolling with some preliminary bloodwork on my end with all good results. We have also scheduled a sperm analysis for my husband next month.
I guess I’m just looking for some success stories of couples who conceived naturally (without any medical intervention) after actively trying for 6+ months. I’m feeling very discouraged today and need some encouragement that I’m not out of the game. I feel like most people at this point in trying require medical intervention. (For the record, I am 29 and DH is 30… I know I’m on the older end, but i don’t think I’m too old… maybe I am? blah)
Post # 2
I know how discouraging this is, and I’m sorry you’re going through it. It took us 16 months and a missed miscarriage thrown in there to conceive my son. We started some testing before I found out I was finally pregnant, and everything was normal. My doctor said it was just rotten luck. Either way, it was awful. TTC was one of the most stressful times of my life. Hugs to you!
Post # 3
My good friend and her husband conceived naturally after 9 years of trying and no intervention 🙂 There is always hope!
Post # 4
Sending you positive thoughts. I know since youre under 35 most doctors wont start additional invasive tests until after one year of TTC, but a SA is a great start. If you got off BC in Feb 2016, I would make an appt with your obgyn and be like we’ve been TTC a year. yeah, not exactly the truth, but eff it. it will get the ball rolling on additional testing.
Post # 5
We actively tried for 9 months, finally conceived and then miscarried. I was very fortunate to then conceive again and am pregnant now.
Post # 6
Commenting mostly just to follow. DH and I are in a very similar situation, started last August and are the same ages. My heart goes out to you.
Post # 7
We conceived on cycle 7 or 8 naturally and I’m older than you (38) so it is possible! I had my prescription for Clomid all ready to go for the next cycle when I got my BFP. I know it’s frustrating and disappointing but just keep doing what you’re doing and try not to get discouraged! <hugs>
Post # 8
Took us 15. Remember that an average means there are lots of people who take longer.
Post # 9
it took us about 11 cycles to conceive, and for the record, I’m only 22 & currently pregnant. I wouldnt lose all hope just yet! Good luck to you & your husband. A SA would be a good place to start. it could be that you are just missing O each time and thats the issue, too. Its really hard to get it at perfectly the right time!
Post # 10
normal healthy couples will take up to a year. I have several friends that conceived in that 6-12 month window. I have one that conceived after 2 years right before she was due to start fertility treatments. I have another that was told she wouldn’t be able to conceive (so didn’t bother with birth control) and got a surprise baby 8 years later. It’s great to get started on testing though because it will either put your mind at ease or reveal a problem that you can then address. My husband and I needed IVF to conceive and we will for our future children as well but once we KNEW that it was much less stressful and we just got it done.
Post # 11
Thank you ladies! I needed this so much.
I remember taking a pregnancy test our first cycle trying panicing “oh crap I might be pregnant” and the reality of it kinda freaked me out. Of course, it was a BFN. But now I laugh at my past self. Past me had no clue how long this would take. and now I want it more than ever.
Post # 12
My first baby took twelve months actively trying to conceive, my second baby took 2-3 cycles and my third is a one shot wonder! You’re still well within the timeframe for “normal” so I wouldn’t be too worried just yet – hang in there!
Post # 13
Some one I know just conceived about a year and a half after first trying… Just around the time they were referred to a RE! Agreed with someone else, if a normal average is a year that means some people are way under a year and some are way over.
I also read a British RE expert (one of the pioneers of IVF) who said in his opinion people are referred for fertility treatment way too quickly and many would be successful naturally if they just gave it more time.
All that said though, I totally understand your frustration. We will begin trying later this year and I’m half scared it will happen really quickly and half scared it will take a while (or won’t happen at all).
Post # 14
Ahh I just realized I have a major typo in my original post. It was supposed to say I really wanted to have a baby in May 2017, not 2016….
Post # 15
Me! I conceived after 8 cycles (around 9.5 calendar months because I have long cycles.) And I’ve got you beat on age, too. I’m 37. I know it is hard, but try to keep the faith.
In my case, I was TTC for baby #2. Baby #1 was conceived on the first try, using OPKs and temping. I used the same method unsuccessfully for six long cycles the second time around. Some months, we tried EOD, some months we tried ED during the FW, but all of those cycles had good timing with nothing to show for it. I was beyond frustrated.
Because of my age, I went to specialist after 6 months. We completed all testing, and everything came back great. The specialist was sort of a downer, though. He thought that since we’d gone 6 cycles with great timing and no pregnancy, the odds weren’t in our favor. He said we had less than a 5% chance of conceiving naturally and that IVF was our best bet but that he thought we should try some medicated IUI cycles first. We were crushed.
Fertility treatment was not something we wanted to consider, so DH and I basically stopped trying. We obviously weren’t using BC, but I stopped temping and using OPKs, etc. Low and behold, two months later I conceived and now I’m 12.5 weeks.
I feel for you. Those 9.5 months of “unexplained infertility” completely sucked. I felt like I had no joy in my life. TTC consumed me and it stressed my marriage. And I felt guilty that baby #1 wasn’t enough. I went to therapy for a few months and felt it helped immensely.
I have my fingers crossed for you! And: you are not too old. 🙂