(Closed) Concerned about finding a Church…

posted 8 years ago in Catholic
Post # 3
Member
2083 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

I think it will be fine. My Fiance just had to become a registered member of the church before the day of the wedding, but they shouldn’t turn you away at the moment. I think it is usually just set up as a guideline of something you must do prior to the actual day of the ceremony.

Post # 4
Member
1580 posts
Bumble bee

It can’t hurt to officially register as a parishoner (at the church where he goes now or the future church). All you do is fill out some paperwork and then they start sending you donation envelopes. If you’re worried about it, you might as well just have him register.

A year would definitely be enough time for a priest to counsel you and prepare you for marriage, even if issues should arise. Perhaps you can ask them to pencil in the date for you before you meet with the priest.

Post # 5
Member
2083 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

Also, usually it is a guideline that you attend mass too. At least that was one of the things we had to agree upon with the priest – that we would come to mass as much as we could (we live an hour away from the church that is marrying us so it is a little more difficult for us, which they understood). I would definitely just try to get a meeting ASAP though, I think you’ll just stress yourself out over it until you know positively that your date is secured!

Post # 6
Member
287 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 1992

I had a very similar problem. In my case I was the person who was born and raised catholic and my fiance is agnostic. Our compromise was that we were going to get married in the catholic church but not have the full blown mass. My concern was that we were new to the area and had not started attending any church yet.

I know how you feel, I made myself sick about being concerned whether or not the church would be cool with that or not. My fiance also was not willing to convert (which I totally respect) again it was a compromise. I asked around at work about catholic churches in the area, and I was referred to a newer catholic church in the area that was more liberal. My fiance and I contacted the priest talked to him directly and was upfront with our situation. He said it would not be a problem, that my Fiance didnt need to convert. The only stipulation is that we have to become parishioners which means attend church and also a meeting once a month. I was like thats it! I was that worried for this!

 My advice is try getting in touch with people you know in the area to see if they have some suggestions. Also look at churches who are newer, a lot of times they may not have those “old-school” traditional rules and such. I know it can be stressful but I promise you that there are churches out there that will be accomadting to your situation. Also, I would ask to talk directly to the priest, since they are who ultimately makes those decisions 🙂

best of luck! if you need any more help feel free to message me!

Post # 8
Member
287 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 1992

Yes, I do think you can do that. Before we ever became parishoners the church penciled us in. Just voice your concerns and your situation to the priest or whatever and they should be understanding.

Post # 9
Member
287 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 1992

there’s one of two things that can happen they say yes, or the say no. if they say no you just move onto to the next catholic church in the area. You’ll be good 🙂

Post # 11
Member
618 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2010 - Catholic Church & The Engine Room at Georgetown Studios

When you call back, I would ask to speak with the Pastoral associate or whomever is in charge of booking the church. Let that person know that you are setting up time to meet with the Priest after Easter to discuss your personal situtation but that you were hoping that they could check the date in question, confirm if it is still open, and perhaps pencil you in.  During Lent, Priests are insanely busy- which is why he asked to to call back after Easter. Some Priests take vacation the week following Easter to recover so you might try to schedule something for more than a week after Easter.

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