Post # 1
So, I have a friend who studied photography at university, and shoots weddings as an aside to her day-job. She knows we’re trying to budget, and has offered to shoot our wedding for us. The problem is that I’m a bit concerned.
The thing is that she’s really flaky. Any group event, holiday or party we’ve organised in the past couple of years she has ALWAYS backed out of at the last minute (this is the main reason she isn’t a bridesmaid, although she doesn’t know this). I’m pretty confident she’ll make it to the wedding, but even if she does, I just don’t know if I’ll be able to speak to her in person beforehand about how it’s going to go.
I don’t want to offend her by calling off the arrangement, and don’t really have a lot in the budget to go towards photography. I tried contacting the local college, as my brother shot a wedding as part of his photography A-Level, but the teacher sent me a link to my friend’s website!
I just wondered if anyone else has any advice about well-meaning but flaky friends?
Post # 3
Have you accepted her offer?
If not, just politely let her down. “Thanks but we’d rather you enjoyed the wedding and we wouldn’t want you to feel as though you were working”. SO offered to photograph our friends as he is semi-pro (as in not his full time job but makes money at it), and that’s what they said to us. We weren’t offended. 🙂
Post # 4
Can you maybe politely turn down her offer….?
Post # 5
I would contact the school back and ask them if they have any othe suggestions? Otherwise, I’d find it in the budget to hire someone. Mixing friends and business never ends well, and if you know she has a history of being flaky enough that you wouldn’t have her a bridesmaid that would be an automatic “NO” for photographer!
Post # 6
- Wedding: March 2012 - Pelican Grand Beach Resort
I would make sure she signs a contract and that she has a backup lined up in case of emergency.
Post # 7
Do you have a contract with her? If not, and you choose to use her as the photographer I would definitely get one in place. This should guarantee that she shows up, unless she wants to face a lawsuit. But honestly, if you are this concerned about it, I would definitely try to find someone else. Your wedding day is not something you will be able to recreate.
Post # 8
First I’d ask her if she’s sure she wants to forego being a normal invited guest to work. It will give her the opportunity to prove that she seems comitted to shooting the wedding, or it might reveal that she’s not as comitted as you were hoping, and you can always “insist” you’d be happier to have her as an honored guest. If she seems comitted, have her sign a contract!! It might be awkward, but easing into it by saying something like “well, if we’re gonna make this about business lets make it official!! Where do I sign!!” should ease some tension about bringing up a contract. Also, I would insist on paying her modestly. Even a hundred dollars. I know you mentioned not being able to pay her much, but if you’ve given her money her sense of obligation will be stronger.
Post # 9
Thanks everyone! I’m definitely going to have a good think about this and may go with the suggestion that she should just have fun as a guest and enjoy the (incredibly rare!) opportunity she has to spend time with all our friends.