- 7 years ago
- Wedding: October 2013
Growing up with no siblings, no close by family and Lesbian parents meant I did not have any weddings to attend as a child. I had no idea there were certain ettiquette rules or behaviours you had to adhere to, so when my good friend got married in 2010 I had no idea what parties to throw and how to behave (I’m not very lady-like, though you wouldn’t guess it looking at me). Thank goodness her other friends knew what to do!
Then a year later everyone and their dog was getting married, and through this process I learned, by much trial and error what to do and what not to do at weddings. Let’s just say, looking back on the 6 weddings I was at in the past 2 years, I am embarassed by my behaviour for sure.
Let me preface this with a note: My friends and I are partiers, we are vulgar, stay out late, and dance dance dance! We often do not censor ourselves around each other and forget that others are around that can hear us. This is us sober, but gets worse with every drink. Also, I am loud. Yeah, LOUD! I have a hard time being quiet and not making noise when I’m happy and excited.
Okay, Confession 1: I was the drunk heckler at a wedding
The day of my friends’ wedding my boyfriend (now Fiance – hehe) told me flat out “I do not ever want to be married and you just have to deal with it”. Yeah… like 1 hour before I had to go meet the girls to get ready. This led to a blowout, and by the time I got to her house to get ready I was a mess. I tried my best to hold it together, but lots of other things happened with the other girls that kept upsetting me, and let’s just say I wear my emotions on my sleeve.
Everyone assumed I was upset that it wasn’t my day and got mad at me, but really I was trying so hard to not cry because throughout the whole ceremony I had to stare at Fiance thinking he didn’t want me and wondering if we were still together …. fast forward to the reception.
It was open bar… and I decided to have some drinks so I could forget about my boyfriend and have fun with my girls that I love. Well, too many vodka shots later I was very loud and very drunk.
(I am so embarassed to abmit this) – I ended up yelling out “take your top off” during the cake cutting because it was an inside joke that seemed funny at the time. I am still mortified that this happened. After the wedding, and all the Boyfriend fuss calmed down days later I apologized profusely and explained what happened to my Bride friend. She felt so bad for thinking I was jealous and we were able to patch our friendship and are now best buds, but OMG what is wrong with me?!?!
Confession 2: I started a laughing attack with 10 friends during the Mother/Son dance.
All of our group of friends were at another wedding. Very traditional Romanian/Italian Wedding – Lots of ppl we didn’t know and then the “friends” table”. Well, the dinner was rediculously long, the hall was freezing and we were right infront of the DJ booth = loud music so we had to yell over it to talk.
Anyway, finally the dances are happening, but we have had some wine at this point and have the giggles. Then the Mother/Son dance song comes on an it is THE FUNNIEST song I have ever heard. It was disney sounding about how a mother will always be with her son, but the lyrics were hilarious. So I start laughing, and I have a very hard time stopping once I get started. Well my other girlfriend (Bride from above) joins in and before I know it the whole table is going. Thankfully, we were drowned out by the music and were able to hide under the table so no one heard us, but I think there are photos of us scrambling under the table trying to hide! Yeah, classy. (PS we still talk about how funny that song was)
Confession 3: I talked through entire dinner speeches without noticing.
We went to a wedding in Buffalo (we are from Toronto) and it was the BEST wedding I have ever been to, BUT there were a lot of ppl so they used 2 rooms for dinner. We were seated at a table with all of the Bride’s Canadian Friends in the second smaller room off to the right of the main room. I LOVED this because we all got along famously, and had such a good time that I didn’t even realize we missed the entire dinner portion of speeches because we were laughing and talking. And not quietly. We couldn’t hear anything from the main room, so we didn’t realize. Atleast, all the other tables in the second room did the same thing. Phew.
What I have learned: Do not assume ppl know about weddings, what to do, how to behave.
I still feel bad about all the things I have done wrong at weddings, but I realize I can’t expect others to know what is normal either. I have learned a lot, and planning our wedding has definitely opened my eyes.
My advice – I will try not to take anything that happens with the guests personally, and roll with the punches because I have been “that girl” at weddings, and I know I will have one at our wedding too. So I better prepare to accept whatever comes and enjoy the day no matter what.
Also, I have great friends who have all forgiven me for all of my terrible choices and behaviours, thank goodness!