(Closed) Conflicted over type of ceremony

posted 9 years ago in Ceremony
Post # 3
350 posts
Helper bee

Well, we’re actually having ours in a church, but I would recommend maybe showing your mom some photos or videos of pretty outdoor weddings.  Maybe it will change her mind once she sees these are “real” weddings too?  Maybe she’s imagining something really hideous.

I don’t think people will not show up simply because it’s not in a church.  They’re your relatives and will want to share your day with you.  My aunt got married outside and had 200 guests or so at her wedding (mostly family.)  Whatever their feelings may be towards church weddings, there’s nothing that Latinos love more than a good party 🙂  Good luck!

Post # 4
900 posts
Busy bee

I can see where your mother is coming from.  As someone with a cultural background that is strongly rooted in the church, I too sometimes feel that wedding ceremonies outside of a church somehow don’t feel “real.”  But it isn’t my wedding and it isn’t your mother’s wedding, so you should do what feels the best for you. 

But if you will be strongly influenced by your family and your guests or subconsciously feel that anything less than a Catholic wedding is somehow incomplete, maybe a church wedding is the way to go.  I always thought that a destination wedding or a beach wedding would be incredible, but at the end of the day, I felt it was more important to me to get married by a priest in a church.

I think it comes down to this:  Do you want the ceremony to be personal and a reflection of you and your fiance?  Or do you want the ceremony to be religious and embrace your family heritage?

Post # 5
472 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

We’re also Catholic but dream of a beach wedding.   Our plan is to follow our dream of marrying on the beach with a JOP family friend performing the ceremony and talking to our priest about ‘blessing’ the marriage a few weeks later.  We have a year and a half so we may change our plan but that’s what we’re planning.  My mother is disappointed it’s not at our church but I had a “bastard” child seven years ago and my Fiance and I have been ‘living in sin’ for over a year so I think she gave up on me years ago :-0

Post # 7
14186 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

oh, haha, I was told that my wedding iddn’t “count” if it was outside, too! I mean, seriously. I say, do what you want. Or, i have a friend who puts it this way: “If I’m otuside, that means there is no roof to get in the way. So, essentially, an outdoor wedding is closer to God”. ha =]. Good luck with your choice! You just have to do what makes you happiest, not your parents.

Post # 8
990 posts
Busy bee

An outside wedding counts just as much as a church wedding! Sometimes family members have these unusual expectations of what a wedding should be and how it should go that they forget to stop and realize it’s the couple’s day … and if you want an outdoor wedding (which you obviously do) I would say go fo it – it will make you happy. And the parents will come around.

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