confused about gifts

posted 6 years ago in Gifts and Registries
Post # 3
11747 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

The people I am buying gifts for:



Parents of Bride 

Parents of Groom


Flower Girl

Ring Bearer

Witnesses (who sign our Ketubah)

Anyone who is performing some duty for your wedding without pay should be given in a gift in my opinion. Not sure what the etiquette here is though. I’d say, anyone who you’d like to thank for doing something special though is a good rule of thumb.

Post # 5
30 posts
  • Wedding: September 2013

My list is similar:



Both sets of parents

Flower girl

Ring Bearer

Officiant (he’s a family friend so we aren’t paying him)


We are having a friend sing a solo so she’s getting one too.

As MrsWBS said, I think the rule is that you should probably get at least a small gift for anyone who’s doing some kind of work without getting paid.


I have no idea what I’m getting them yet though!

Post # 6
635 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

Definitely get a fun gift card or even give cash to the singer and organist. Imagine how much a tip would be if they were charging and maybe gift that amount. (Our organist and soloist both charge $150.)

We will get something small for our readers – no idea what yet, but something very small along with a heart felt thank you card. We’ll also give $20 to each altar boy/girl.

Post # 7
30 posts
  • Wedding: September 2013

Yeah, I was thinking of gift cards also. MY FH just told me he wants to get the GM’s tix for a baseball game.

Post # 9
1217 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

I’ve read that I really nice gift for readers is a hardcover copy of the book they’re reading out of, with a personal note.

Post # 11
62 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

@angelaandchet:  I am no ettiquette expert but I do not think you’d have to get her an additional gift or at least not one of significant monetary value. it might be nice if you gave her a thoughtful card or something like that – personalized handkercheif whatever, especially if you are getting gifts for the grandparents. our grandparents are getting their corsage and that’s it.

Post # 13
3625 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

@angelaandchet:  I’ll be honest. I would probably still get her a gift out of respect for her position. It doesn’t have to be expensive. As PP suggested, a simple handkerchief is cute. If you want to be super super super low budget, you can do a print of your engagement photo in a nice frame (you can get like $10 or less nice ones at Home Goods, Target, Ikea, etc.). Another option is if you don’t have engagement photos, you can do maybe one of your invitation or something.

Post # 13
272 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2016

my list is short Then I guess.. Our parents wouldn’t accept gifts from us for our wedding day.. So we only do:





not giving the officiant anything as we have to pay him.. 

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