Post # 1
I was adopted when I was 6 years old. My name has changed more times than I can count!
The last change was when I was 10 years old. We took my 2nd mom’s last name and made it my middle name. (I was adopted by two women. Yes, I call them mom1 and mom2.)
So right now my name is (firstname)(mom2’slastname)(mom1’slastname). It is pretty darn long and does not fit in the bubbles on medical forms.
I am considering taking my husband’s last name when we have our wedding celebration. (We were legally married about 7mo ago for insurance purposes).
But I am sad about giving up one of my mom’s last names, and I really don’t want to hyphenate. Too long!!!
I feel so proud of my moms for being brave through the whole adoption process even as they were ridiculed because they are a same-sex couple. I feel like dropping one or both of their last names belittles the work they put in to claiming me as their daughter.
My husband wants me to choose what makes me happiest and he will accept my choice and support it.
6mo ago, I did not want to change my name at all. The major thing that changed my mind? I read the fifty shades of grey trilogy. I’m serious. Stop laughing! I loved the interaction between Ana and Christian when they call each other Mrs. and Mr. Grey. Yes. I make weird connections. But that’s when it started. I think it is too sweet. You’re still laughing. That’s okay.
Ugh I am stuck.
Post # 3
Could you somehow combine your mom’s names into one and have it as your middle name? Like say you are Anna Smith Jacobson, you could be Anna Smithson (new last name).
Just an idea.
Post # 4
@scarlet_letter: Some people have two middle names, which I think is more common in the South? That way you can retain both your moms’ names while picking up your husband’s last name, and without having to hyphenate anything.
You could also try to incorporate both last names into one name. For example, Wilson + Alfred = Wilfred. It doesn’t work with all names, but it’s worth a shot.
Lastly, you could always just go by your husband’s name socially. You would still be Your First Name + Mom 1’s Last Name + Mom 2’s Last Name legally, but you could introduce yourself as “Mrs. DH’s Last Name” to friends and put that down on Christmas/holiday cards.
ETA: I think it’s wonderful that you are trying to honor both of your moms. Also, I had another idea. If you were to drop one of your moms’ names from your name and you decided to have children, you could give your son one of your mom’s last names as a middle name. Or if you have a daughter, you could give her one of your mom’s first names as a middle name. Just a thought.
Post # 5
- Wedding: March 2014 - Brazil Room
I have two middle names and it’s no big deal (just very long on my DL and passport). I think it would be great to take your husband’s last name and make your two moms’ last names your two middle names. Whichever name is first will be your “middle initial” when you fill out forms.
Post # 6
Two middle names, girlfriend. I’m doing it!
Post # 7
@Birdee106: A good idea, but with these names that will not work. 🙁 Thanks though!
@somethingaquamarine: No children in our future but that is a great idea. I like the idea of using DH’s last name socially.
Good to hear from people who have two middle names. I am considering this more and more. Thank you.
Post # 8
You could also maybe take FI’s last name, and make your two mom’s first names your new middle name, so your name isn’t so long?
(Your name) (Mom 2 first name) (Mom 1 first name) (FI Last name)
Post # 9
- Wedding: September 2013 - Sodo Park
I’m pretty sure I’m taking Sparky’s last name socially and keeping my name professionally. I might change my mind when we have kids, but for now that’s my plan!
Post # 10
So, apparently, in WA state when you change your last name due to marriage you cannot move your maiden name to become your middle name. Some weird rule for WA and a few other states. I’m still looking into it.
@Miss Campfire: That is logical. I also agree with that plan because of your work and being published etc.
Post # 11
You can have two middle names. On most forms, full name can just be first/last, though sometimes not.
Post # 12
@scarlet_letter: didn’t see the bit about WA state. I think you’d have to go through a full legal name change, to add a new middle name.