- 6 years ago
Hope you don’t mind me jumping in here, but I’ve been thinking about this for a long time and was hoping to get some input on this. I’m not engaged yet, but it should be happening within a few months. SO is dropping some MAJOR hints, so i am expecting it anytime now. We’ve talked about weddings and what we’d like to do, but sometimes I wonder why bother?
My first marriage was a German civil ceremony (my husband was in the Army and stationed over there late 99), and we had a very simple courthouse style wedding. We had all intentions to do a vow renewal in the future, but he passed away a few years ago, leaving me an only parent of four young kids. Since then I have found a wonderful man on eHarmony, who is a 35 year old bachelor with no kids etc. He’s a loner, and I live 4 hours away from my family. What I’m saying is that most of my family and his family won’t come because we live so far away…plus, mine live in Canada. And being that it will be a 2nd wedding, they won’t see it as important even though none of them were at my first. SO’s family just doesn’t care, which is really sad, and they live two states away.
This time aroudn though, I want to wear the white dress, I want to walk down the aisle, and have a (small) party. I want my 11 year old son to walk me down the aisle too. I want the photography, i want our fam and friends there, and my kids to all have an awesome time together. But if there aren’t that many people coming, what is the point in buying a dress, hiring a photographer, having a reception? I’m kind of sad about it, and we have talked a lot about it. My extended family is really indifferent to the whole thing unfortunately, especially because I live in WA state and they’re up north in Canada.
As much as I want all of that, if there is no one there to help us celebrate, what is the point in celebrating with a party like that? (Seriously, not trying to sound all “woe is me”. I’m really confused about it all) We wont have a huge budget at all, so it will be somethign small regardless. I’m feeling down that my family won’t really want to come all the way down here (aunts/uncles/cousins/grandma etc). Plus, SO just wants somethign super super simple.
Or maybe a better take on this would be…how do you plan a memorable wedding for a first time groom/encore widowed 32 year old bride that incorporates the kids? and still have the wedding you always wanted, albeit a very small/budget one?
I think I just feel like I’m a conundrum lol. I’m almost like a first time bride because I’ve never had a wedding, yet I have circumstances that will probably prevent that.