Post # 1
Let me start off by letting you guys know that we are not even trying to get pregnant yet. In fact i am just a “waiting bee” still, although Ive been told and given hints that the proposal will be sometime this year.. we have been together for 8 1/2 yrs and plan on trying/not really preventing once we are married and when it happens, it happens..
But lately (well the last few yrs off and on actually) Ive had the constant fear in the back of my head that once Im finally ready to have children, i wont be able to conceive. I am only 24 (would like to be about 26 when we start trying) and i havent had any health issues like PCOS or endometriosis (sp) or anything in my family that would lead me to believe that im not fertile, except for the fact that ive never met my father or anyone on his side of the family which makes me worry sometimes about other things like breast cancer, infertility, etc.. I also have been on the ortho tri-cyclen brith control pills since i was 16 which makes 7 yrs this month, so that also makes me worry that i’ll somehow become sterile (crazy i know, no studies have shown that, that im aware of)
Im sure this is a very common concern/worry for women but I just cant get it off my mind…..any ladies in the same boat as me??
Post # 3
@cdenise89: I have this same fear! Once we get married, we won’t start trying for 4-5 years, but I am still worried. I’ve never had any issues so far and my mother had seven children. I think this is a common fear. My other friend who is not even seeing anyone now has this fear too.
Post # 4
I think you should not worry. You’re young and don’t have any diagnosed fertility problems.
FWIW, my FSIL was told she had PCOS and got pregnant *while* she was on BC! On the other hand, I also know a 30-year-old who suffers from stage IV Endometriosis. She’s planning on doing IVF, not sure if she’ll get pregnant or not though. I think she said that if she doesn’t succeed in getting pregnant this year she’ll get a hysterectomy.
Post # 5
@cdenise89: I took the same BCP too and i was on it for at least 6 yrs before i went off it and started TTC. I had the same fears as you are having now, but honestly only time will tell whether you are fertile or not. There is no way to know until you actually get all those wonderful tests done your body;(….I am sorry to hear your are having this fear, but why don’t you try talking to your MD about it, maybe there is something she can do or tell you that may be more reassuring and comfoting for you. This is my 5th cycle trying and if i dont get preggos this cycle, I have to go through those tests starting next cycle. I waited. If you don’t want to wait, I suggest to talk to your MD.
GL and wish you the best ;))))
Post # 6
- Wedding: September 2012 - Mother of the Bride's residence
I started charting a few months before our wedding, partly because of this! I managed to convince myself that we would run into problems — so charting has shown me that I ovulate every cycle, at least, which has been really reassuring.
I know for some people charting leads to MORE anxiety though (going through something similar right now with genetic testing).
Post # 7
Yep!! I’m getting married in September, I’ll be 28, and will go off birth control and just “see what happens” for a little while. I’ve been on low dose birth control (ortho tri-cyclen and loestrin) for about 10 years too, and I’m convinced I will have fertility problems for a couple of reasons. I never had really regular periods before I went on the pill, and I run marathons and am quite thin, so I just feel like I can’t get pregnant. Plus, my FI is 37, so I feel a little added pressure that it can’t take too long because he’s getting older (I know men can have kids much later, but we don’t want him to be too old!). I’m sure we’ll be fine, but I totally understand the worry!
Post # 8
This falls under the category of “try not to worry about something that you don’t have any control over.”
I know it’s difficult, because we spend so many years trying to prevent pregnancy only to turn around one day and want the exact opposite. But until you are ready to start trying, there is no way of knowing what will happen, so it’s not really with worrying over.
Just for comparison, I started BC at age 17 after 3 years of very irregular periods. I was on it for 13 years and stopped taking it in April. DH and I were still actively preventing while my cycles normalized, which never happened. They ranged from 23-49 days and drove me crazy.
On December 17, I visited my OBGYN to do blood tests and an internal ultrasound to see if there is a medical reason I’m not regulating. Everything tested normal. He recommended that I start temping to see if/when I O each month.
Shock of my life when I got a BFP my first month temping! Didn’t even know when I was going to O, so it was more or less an accident that we somehow timed our BD correctly.
So bottom line, there’s no use stressing until there’s something to stress over 🙂
Post # 9
I’m about 5 years from TTC, but I have a recourring nightmare that I go to the gyno for a regular appointment, and they tell me that, if I want kids, I have to start trying RIGHT THEN or it may never happen.
It’s scary. It’s been happening about once or twice a year since I was 16/17. Not often, but often enough to really freak me out.
Post # 10
I also worried about infertility with absolutely no evidence pointing to that. Really, my main issue was that we waited until I was 29 to try so I thought it might take longer. I got pregnant our second cycle trying and I’m 26 weeks now. You’re young! Try not to worry just yet.
Post # 11
@cdenise89: It’s crossed my mind, but I don’t really worry about it. For your own sake, you really should talk to a doctor about your concerns so they can alleviate your worries.
There’s like zero reason to expect you might be infertile. You’re also really young so it’s not like you even need to worry about it taking a long time for you to get pregnant.
Unless there’s something you’ve left out of your post, your fears sound pretty irrational to me. I’m the queen of irrational fears so I get it… but logically you’re just working yourself up for nothing.
And worst case scenario, if you can’t have your own kids, you could adopt. It’s not like you MUST be child-free. I am pretty sure you’ll be fine, though.
Post # 12
I have this fear too! 7 years ago, when I was 18, I was raped by my best friend and got pregnant. I went through severe depression, cried all night, slept all day, never went to any of my classes (freshman year of college), and I ended up miscarrying. Of course, when it happened, I considered it a huge blessing (I still do)!
I’m almost positive that I miscarried as a result of either my depression, or constant praying to God, telling him that I wasn’t ready and to please help me deal with the situation.. But now that I’m engaged and about to get married and plan on eventually starting a family, I fear that “what if” I miscarried because I just couldn’t carry babies well…
I’m sure I have nothing to worry about. There are no health issues or history of inferility in my family… but I can’t help but panic a little inside. i think that when we get to a point in our lives when we’re so passionate about starting a fanily, we tend to worry…
Post # 13
@cdenise89: I had the same fear! These days there are so many people struggling with fertility issues that I thought I would too. My sister, SIL, and friends have gone through these issues in the past year:
- miscarriage, baby deceased at 9 weeks, extra chromasome
- D&C, ectopic pregnancy
- trying for 3 years+
I too was on ortho for a very long time. 14 years!! That worried me a lot too. I really thought that it would take awhile for us to get the BFP but it didn’t happen that way. We didn’t really TTC until we had been married 5 months. I started charting in November and got PG in November. Everyone is different and you are still young enough that you have plenty of healthy eggs. Don’t cross that bridge until you come to it. Worry about getting a ring and than the wedding first. Enjoy where you are and don’t worry so much about the future. GL!
Post # 14
@cdenise89: I’m 27 but yea I have those fears too!
Post # 15
@cdenise89: try not to stress or worry about it. stress itself can do a lot of damage to your body and gets your body out of whack. Last thing you need is stress 🙂
Post # 16
I could have written this post myself. I too have no reason to believe I will have issues.
I just started having this fear, and I know that none of my friends have even thought about infertility. After reading about all the bees who have struggled I can’t help but think that could happen to me.
I know I cannot control any of these issues, yet I still find myself reading infertility blogs, etc. Which only makes the worrying worse. The only thing that helps me is reading about all of the ladies on the boards who get pregnant at the drop of a hat.