I understand that when you feel somebody is copying you, having people say “you should feel flattered” is not helpful. Depending on your relationship with your sister, this could be the final straw in a long line of straws; like if she dated your ex boyfriend, wore a similiar prom dress, stole your clothes and make-up, et cet. We don’t know your relationship, so I empathize that a situation like this can certainly be annoying.
You have control over two things here:
- Your attitude
- Your decorations
And that’s it.
From the things your family has said to you, you are complaining to your family about your sister’s plans. You need to knock that off, immediately. It’s jealous, it’s petty, and mean-spirited. It’s making you look like a colossal bitch, and making your sister look like a victim.
Doesn’t that stick in your craw a bit? She’s copying you, and everybody thinks she’s the victim? Rise above!
Your complaining is not going to change her plans at all. What you are doing with this complaining is like… shouting into a well. It accomplishes nothing.
You have no thunder to steal. Your thunder evapporated into the clouds the morning after your wedding, as is right and normal.
WHAT GUESTS SAY:
Guests will not compare the two weddings because (sorry for being harsh), literally nobody cares. NOBODY. The day after, the week after the wedding, maybe your mom and your grandma still cared. But it’s a year later and nobody is having coffee with friends, saying “Remember augustbride123’s floral arrangements? They were to die for! And those pink tone dresses, SWOON!”
That’s just not how life works.
The only people who keep obsessing over little wedding details are the bridal couple. And that’s ok, that’s normal! But don’t kid yourself that her guests are going to be on their cellphones pulling up your Facebook wedding album and saying “Look Florence, I’ve seen this centrepiece before!”
So what if she takes her first-look photos at the same park?
How does it take away from your own photos?
Nobody is going to look at her photos and say “Hmmmm. She did this better than augustbride123.”
First-look photos are not a unique concept. Many of the couples do very similiar things and make similiar faces. Nervous smile. Tears. Awed smile. Hug. Kiss. Nothing unique about it.
You don’t have to sell or give those decorations to her. You can refuse and throw them out. If you do that, she’s probably going to run right out and buy the exact same thing anyway, so you don’t “win”.
Or you can sell them to her, at fair market rate, same price you’d ask of any online buyer. Then use the money to do something nice for yourself.
Or, you could be the bigger person and gift the decorations to her.
Unless these used decorations are worth a lot of money, like over $500 or something, I think you’re being extremely petty.
If you plan on having children, don’t discuss baby name ideas with her. If she does name her children the same names you chose, there’s nothing you can do about that either. Lots of families have three or four John’s or Mary’s and it’s nothing to get upset about either.