Post # 1
Just wondering who else is in it with me. With all of this going on and not being sure of job stability we are preaparing to push it out. If you saw my previous posts, DH and I were still figuring it out, and at the beginning of this year we were deciding on spring of next year, with the option to push up to this fall depending on if we got some stuff done this summer. Well… stuff this summer may not happen now and pushing it out. I’m so sad! Who else needs to have a quick pity party then move forward?
Post # 2
I definitely understand your concerns! There will be people who tell you to live your life and no time is the perfect time, but sometimes there are actually bad times to become pregnant.
We were toying with the idea of early this year or end of this year and this is making us consider the end of the year much more. With all the lockdowns it is impossible to know which of us will have a salary next month, the month after or the month after that. We could survive month to month on one salary but I wouldn’t want to find out I was pregnant after one of us lost our jobs or was working on reduced pay – way too much stress in my opinion since it is a very real possibility.
The concern is losing my job 3 months pregnant and not being able to seriously get another after that point, or DH losing his and then the stress of maternity pay being our only income looming over us.
There is so much uncertainty right now!
Post # 3
I’m so sorry 🙁 We’re pretty fiscally conservative, so the thought of starting an unknown financial strain is the main deciding factor of living our lives or not. I am also so anxious with the state of this if I’d be alone at appointments etc. (seeing NY not let dads into the delivery room). I just am too scared to start something in this climate… but I want to live! Ugh. Hugs to you (from 6+ feet apart).
Post # 4
We are pushing it out due to job security concerns. I’m not getting any younger at 34 but there is just too much up in the air for us right now to feel remotely okay about TTC.
Post # 5
We had been ttc since last August, and we are taking an indefinite break now because of coronavirus. We live in a city that has tens of thousands of cases, so it’s a very real risk here. My reasons for not wanting to be pregnant right now:
– Pregnancy is an immune compromised state. Do I really want to willingly put myself at greater risk of having a serious or life-threatening case during a pandemic raging in my city?
– The effects of covid19 on early stages of pregnancy are unknown at this point. There is evidence that the other coronaviruses SARS/MERS caused miscarriage and birth defects in early stages of pregnancy. Again, there is just a lot we don’t know with this virus and that scares me.
– Hospitals in my city are overrun, and I do not want to have to go to one for routine appointments, let alone if I had complications. Some pregnancy complications require immediate medical intervention and I’d be afraid both of not getting that care and also of taking a bed away from someone else.
– Women aren’t even allowed to have their husbands in the delivery room in NYC right now.
Post # 6
- Wedding: June 2019 - City, State
I’m 32 week pregnant now. If I was in the middle of TTC, I would take a break for a few cycles to see how this shakes out. It’s a really scary time to be pregnant.
Post # 7
Planned to start sometime in late spring/early summer, now it’s on hold until we get some idea of how things are shaking out. If our country doesn’t make the catastrophically stupid call to reopen our country too early, I’d think that by mid-summer/early fall, we’ll have a good idea of a timeline/possible resurgences in the winter.
Post # 8
Our original plan was to start TTC in July. We aren’t quite as certain of that now, we’re in a wait and see place at the moment.
Post # 9
We TTC before this happened and are now 14 weeks pregnant. Even with what we know now I wouldn’t change a single thing. Most couples TTC for the first time have no idea how long it will take. Sure it could happen right away but it might not. I would be TTC now if we weren’t already pregnant because at 35 I’m not going to risk my fertility over this. It could have taken us a year and I would hate myself if I had wasted any time not TTC if when we did try after putting it on hold it took a really long time. At 35 I had no time to waste. Yes even if money was an issue. Because we want kids and we would make it work whatever was thrown at us. The alternative is possibly not having kids which isn’t an option.
Post # 10
I’m 18 weeks pregnant now, but it took us almost a year and a half to have a pregnancy stick. Knowing that, I probably wouldn’t want to wait because of covid-19. However, it is a scary time to be pregnant, I’ll admit that.
Post # 11
I’m 13 weeks and thinking I might take a break if we were still TTC. The most vulnerable part of pregnancy is that first trimester, and entering that time as cases are increasing so fast would be really scary. I had a bad case of the flu at 8 weeks and it was SO TERRIFYING because it was very hard to keep my fever down. Covid would be of course SO much scarier. I’m feeling lucky that I got past the first tri before things started turning gravely serious in my city. Sending you health and luck either way!
Post # 12
I found this video to be a good mix of encouraging and eye opening. She’s an ob/gyn out of Texas.
I also think that there’s a big difference between those who have some sort of time crunch/pressure (age, fertility issues, family considerations, etc.) and those who don’t. For those of us who do have some wiggle room, no matter how upsetting it is, the pros of waiting outweigh the cons. For those with that crunch, the risk calculus looks way different (and that’s okay!).
Nobody knows when this will end. In 9-11 months, we could be facing round 2 of this and all of these scary things like being isolated, not being able to have partners in the delivery room, possible separation from baby if you test positive, etc. could be in play. Additionally, there is currently zero reliable data on how this impacts people in their first trimester. For those who went forward with TTC and were successful, and are now in their first trimester, there’s really no sense in agonizing over it…the deed is done, and all you can do is try to be safe and minimize anxiety. But for those of us weighing the risks, it’s a huge unknown, and 2-6 months could buy us a lot of reassuring information.
Post # 13
Between financial concerns and medical facility concerns (not to mentions concerns about a novel virus affecting a fetus),we would rather wait….. but I’m 37.5 and my husband is 47, so we just don’t have the time. We have a 1.5 year old and hope to have a sibling for him. So we are being extra cautious with Covid precautions and continuing on. I definitely would hold up if I were like 30 though!
Post # 14
We were in the middle of TTC and actually had a miscarriage last cycle. We were going to try again this month when this all unfolded and I have put it to a halt. Between the loss and this horrible virus shutting down the globe, I don’t know when or even if we will TTC again.
Post # 15
If we were TTC right now, we would stop. But I am in my late twenties and already a mom to one. If we had been trying for a while unsuccessfully, or we were older, I would continue to try.
Right now we plan on NTNP late summer/early fall. If our country is still in crisis mode, we will delay. If cases of COVID have leveled out, but there is still “social distancing” while we wait for a vaccine, we will go ahead. Honestly, I would welcome the one-visitor restriction and social distancing during the newborn phase. I felt overwhelmed with visitors with my daughter, and I wish I had had a (nonoffensive) reason to turn down overbearing family members. Obviously I would never wish for such a tragic situation as COVID-19, but it would be a silver lining.