(Closed) Corsage Drama! Need advice!

posted 6 years ago in Flowers
Post # 3
Member
4193 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: July 2012 - Baltimore Museum of Industry

I think it’s definitely a nice gesture to have a corsage for her- I think your idea of a small white one is perfect. It shows a sense of respect for her, but also shows that she’s at a different level than the moms/grandma. My parents are amicably divorced, and I’m still giving my step-mom a smaller corsage.

Post # 4
Member
9550 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2013

I think it’s really nice to give a corsage to your stepmom. Meeting your mom will be awkward for her too, and this will make her feel a little more welcomed. I think as long as your mom knows that she’s your mom and how important she is to you, it’ll be fine. I’m sure you’ve got more than enough love to spread around.

Post # 5
Member
434 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: February 2012

I think the white wrist corsage would be a very welcoming and kind gesture. I’m sure she’ll feel awkward and out of place, as well. From someone from a twice divorced home with a mother that is very vocal about the pain in her life, I can understand where you’re coming from and how hard this must be for your mom. But the divorce was also 10 years ago, your father has been with this woman for a long time and at some point your mom does have to realize that your father’s wife will probably be a part of your life. I’ve learned that the kids in a divorce still have to make decisions that are right for them regardless of how it may come across to the parent. 

Post # 6
Member
509 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

I would absolutely honor her with a corsage. It’s the right thing to do.

Post # 8
Member
1734 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

Super nice gesture. And yes, you can make it smaller/different.

Furthermore, I hope that there’s no other drama around this dynamic — everyone better understand that this is not their day of past issues, but a day to celebrate you and the commitment that you and your Fiance are making! I’ll be thinking of you.

Post # 9
Member
46421 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

At some point your Mom needs to make a conscious decision to move on. She can choose to wallow in pain as  the “wronged wife” for the rest of her life, but that would be completely denying that she played any role in the disintegration of their marriage.

My ex cheated on me, so I know whereof I speak. I made a choice to acknowledge my role in the divorce. I do not think it is righty for any partner to cheat. If they are unhappy they should make their feelings known , and get a commitment to work on the relationship together or get out of the relationship before they start a new one.

Having said all that, I definitely think it is appropriate to acknowledge her as your Dad’s wife. A small corsage would be very gracious.

I hope your mother is gracious enough to act in a civil manner during your wedding.

Post # 10
Member
2067 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

I think you should get her a corsage – she and your dad would really appreciate it 🙂

Post # 11
Member
1810 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

I think your plan is great! My FI’s parents are in a VERY similar situation and his mom and his stepmom are not on good terms …they hate eachother. BUT because my FI’s stepmom did help raise him I did want to give her a corsage. SOOO I gave her a smaller corsage with a different color, I also let his mom choose which color she wanted.

Post # 13
Member
2616 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

my mom, mom of groom and father of the grooms’ girlfriend are all getting white flower cosages.  i spend tons of time with fil gf way more then mob so all them will be getting equal sized flowers. if mob realized her flowers were bigger or smaller she would very bluntly say it…. not looking for anyway she can cause drama.

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