Post # 1
Hello bees! After lurking for quite some time I finally gained the courage to make an account. You all have already helped me through some tough waiting days.
A little about me: I have been with my SO for just about 3 years. We are both 20 (yes, pretty young) and live together during the summer when we’re not required to live in our college dorms. He’s amazing, but the (unintentionally) cruelest man when it comes to getting engaged. Right after our 4 month anniversary he wished at 11:11 that I would marry him, and we’ve been openly talking about weddings and our future ever since. We pretty much have the whole darn thing planned out already. He also asks me to marry him 3-4 times a month! I’m serious. He will randomly kiss me and ask me, almost like a real proposal. It’s cute, but so frustrating! Last night he even asked me if I’ll be surprised when he asks for real… I didn’t know what to say.
This Christmas was one of the meanest things he’s ever done though. I know he meant it to be sweet, but I almost cried. We had been planning to get infinity tattoos on our ring fingers, but decided last minute that it would be a bad idea for our future careers as teachers. So on Christmas morning he wakes me up, tells me to close my eyes, and slips a ring on my finger! It is a gorgeous silver infinity ring. Nothing expensive, since neither of us have jobs, but beautiful and meaningful. I would have accepted it as an engagement ring, but he didn’t have that in mind. He even joked “This will double as your engagement ring in like five years.” Ugh.
I know that he really will marry me; he’s already told all of his family and family friends to look out for a wedding after we graduate. But the fake proposals are driving me crazy. I love them, but I also wish they would be real! Does anyone else have a boyfriend who “proposes” this often?
Post # 3
ouch! Not that often, but he’s done it once or twice and is fond of calling me Mrs. Hislastname, which makes me crazy! I tell him that next time he asks, there better be a ring (with a laugh and fake-mean eyes lol) and I told him he is not allowed to call me that until we are married. It’s super cute in a way bc at least you know they’re thinking about it, but man it is frustrating!
Post # 4
First of all, Welcome to the bee! Glad you decided to join! 🙂 Second, I would tell your boyfriend straight up to stop ‘fake proposing’. Let him know that the gig is getting old, and that you’re not interested in hypotheticals at this point in your relationship. Maybe he thinks it’s cute, and that he’s reassuring you about how he feels, but that would personally drive me insane! I would have a serious conversation with him about when you both envision taking that step together. Would you like to wait a while as well? Do you want to get engaged right now, or is it just that he’s putting these thoughts in your head, and it’s annoying becuase then you get your hopes up?
Post # 5
@NerdCampLove: Welcome welcome!
Oh no! Sweetie I don’t know what to say to you but no, my bf does not and I’m very thankful for that. He assures me but never says “will you marry me?” because I’d slap him in a very painful place if he did that for no reason other than just to humor himself.
Post # 6
I wouldn’t like it at all if my boyfriend (now DH) “proposed” to me that often. To me, it kinda cheapens the actual moment and makes me think that if that happened to me, I would have been like “Are you serious this time? I can’t tell ..”
Post # 7
@jules28 I’d like to be engaged somewhere around our graduation/five year anniversary, and he knows that. Then we’ll have a long engagement while both of us do grad school. Although the stunt with the ring gave me the engagement itch 🙂
I think he does it as a reminder since we have so long to go before we get married. He’s actually assured me that I’ll definitely know when the real one is happening. I guess we’ll find out…
Thanks for the welcome y’all!
Post # 8
My fiance fake proposed twice.
The first time, we were out to a very nice dinner, and I was talking about how I spoke with my cousin that day about her upcoming wedding, and he goes, speaking of weddings, reaches for his pocket and starts to bend onto his knee and goes “nah, I’m just kidding.” I laughed and told him that was mean.
The second time, we were in our apartment, but it was basically the same thing. Based on my reaction (I was not laughing this time), it never happened again 🙂
But, when he did propose, as he was getting down on one knee, I said “What are you doing? Is this for real? You aren’t actually proposing are you? Is this a fake proposal?!”
Then I saw the ring and realized it wasn’t the fake one!
So, long story short, you aren’t alone in this. But I totally get how it gets old – and fast!