Post # 1
I am the matron of honor in my best friends wedding and we got on the topic of showers. She does not want a traditional shower where she opens gifts and it’s only women. She loved the idea of a couples shower that is more like a cocktail party with light food.
How would they handle not opening gifts? I’ve heard concepts of “open showers” where guest bring a gift wrapped in nothing but maybe a bow or ribbon so guests can kind of wander and look at what was given which allows more time for her and her mister to socialize and thank everyone for coming.
Have any other bees have this situation? How did you word the invites? Were guests offended?
Post # 3
@theeekingeek: Are you sure she wants gifts?
Post # 4
That sounds more like an engagement party to me. I’d drop the whole shower thing and call it an engagement party. I’ve been to showers like this before and honestly, it kind of puts me off. If i can buy you the gift, the least you can do is open it in front of me and ooh and ahh for a few minutes. It is the point of a shower, after all.
Post # 5
The only issue I can see is people come to a shower and know its for giving presents and thus exspect some kind of grand acknowledgment of the gift, AT the shower. So it may be a little off putting to some of the crowd when that doesn’t happen. Unless the bride and groom plan to personally do that for each gift (which would seem to take longer than just opening them) there may be some weirdness. Personally, if they want a cocktail party have a cocktail party. But if I came for a shower and brought a present, I want it to not just get set in a line where I don’t even know if the bride and groom saw it.
Post # 6
My Maid/Matron of Honor and my parents had a couple shower for us!!! Im so glad they did because It was so much fun, most of our firends are either engaged or married so we didnt want the typical bridal shower and it was 2 months before our wedding so it was more of a shower then an engagment party. we didnt know about anything until the day of the shower, my Maid/Matron of Honor wanted it all to be a surprise.
My Maid/Matron of Honor made invites and did an “around the clock” theme. She put a different time of day for each invite and the gift was supposed to be something we would use for that time of day! (ex. like for 5pm somebody got us silverware, my bridesmaid had 12am she got us victorias secret gift card, bottle of tequila, and yankee candle, body oil, and chocolates, somebody else had 3am and she gave us pillows….. each invite had a time on it, some times were done more then once, it was fun) she also put our registry info at the bottom of theinvite.
My husband and I had so much fun opening gifts, our guests had fun too, we laughed and tried to guess the time that gift was for, people came up with some great and creative stuff and we got some great things off the registry as well 🙂
We had more of a lunch with one signiture drink and then we also had dancing and fun couple games, one of the games was the pre newleywed game, omg it was so funny!!! my Maid/Matron of Honor asked the questions and we were in the spot light! It was so much fun 🙂
Post # 7
She does want to have a registry, but doesn’t want a “shower”. I had a traditional shower so I am totally clueless and kind of looking for any kind of suggestion. I am wondering if leaving out the word shower and calling it something else might help.
I was hoping it would seem less innappropriate since it will also be men and woman. There also would be no games. Pretty much not a shower at all but if someone wants to bring a gift they can. Kinda like a wedding pre party.
Post # 8
@Future Mrs K: I’m usually not into themes for gifts but that sounds like a lot of fun!
@theeekingeek: I think if you aren’t going to open gifts you should let people know not to bring gifts. If you don’t say anything people will bring gifts and expect them to be opened there. I’ve been to couples shower that were more like cocktail parties, but they still opened gifts. It didn’t take up too much time and the rest of the night was spent eating drinking and mingling. If she doesn’t want to do that I think you have to nix the presents all together.